Five Venezuelan Musical Acts We'd Gladly Deport Kat Stacks For

La Criolla tetona

Okay, it wasn't until my colleague Esther Park's blog about Ms. Kat Stacks arrest and possible deportation that I learned hip-hop's most hated bitch is Venezuelan. Needless to say, I was disappointed. Not only is the country presided over by one of history's dumbest assholes, but now this "thing" continues to cast shame on the Venezuelan community in South Florida.

Oh well, she does have a banging body. And what little I understand from her bizarre version of the English language is humorous in a I-wish-she-had-the-same-ESOL-teacher-that-I-had kind of way.

After the jump, check out five Venezuelan musical acts worth trading Kat Stacks for.

1.La Banda de la Banana Voladora
These guys were a pretty cool reggae/ska outfit from Caracas that mixed politics with a tongue-in-cheek sense of humor and some danceable ditties. La Banda brought many a smile to listeners in the early days of the Chavez regime.

2. Ultrachic
These guys are part-time residents of South Florida and are currently on tour in Venezuela. They go for the sexy with a nice pop-and-Soda-Stereo blend, accentuated by the decidedly better looking broads in this video. Hate on that, Kat.

3. Sentimiento Muerto
This band's iconic slashed-out heart logo was turned into a graffiti stencil throughout most of Venezuela in the '80s. Sentimiento Muerto is also the band that opened up the door to Venezuelan rock, even inspiring many musical groups from Central and South America when this video made it into MTV's regular rotation. In 1999, the band's singer Cayayo Troconis sadly passed away at 31 from respiratory failure.

4. Ladies W.C.
One of the first rock 'n' roll outfits to emerge in Venezuela. The singer Steve Scott was born in Venezuela to American parents and the crew's sole album set up the blueprint for later garage/psych outfits like the Love Depression, Spiteri, and Los Pets.

5. Drömdead
This hardcore punk outfit takes its cues from D-Beat and Finnish music. But in spirit and content, Drömdead is a product of President Hugo "Monkey Balls" Chavez's questionable forays into twisted "socialism" and excessively homoerotic admiration for Fidel Castro. Sadly, singer Giovanni was knifed to death outside a bar in Caracas