Your Anti-Guido Party Guide to Ultra Week in South Beach

By Sean Levisman Thu., Mar. 3 2011 at 8:30 AM

Categories: Talking Shit, Ultra Music Festival, Winter Music Conference

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We guarantee guido DJ Pauly D of Jersey Shore is NOT in this guide.

If you're a discerning local EDM lover, then you probably have a love-hate relationship with the month of March.

On one hand, it's the best month out of the year in Miami for the sheer awesomeness of parties and bookings. On the other, it also summons massive hordes of the much-maligned guido.

Now no disrespect to the Italian-American community -- we're simply throwing the term back in the faces of the very Jersey Shore types who popularized it to begin with.

For Miamians, 'guido' has come to define a certain breed of douchey, trashy tourist meathead that invades South Beach during WMC and Ultra Week. They mob up the hotels and pool parties with their eye-sore fashion sense and rowdy fist-pumping, and sink the good-taste quotient of the whole place, even lower than usual for SoBe. It's the reason why many prefer to avoid the Beach altogether in favor of parties tailored for more sensible music fans in Wynwood and downtown.

Now, while we can't guarantee a 100-percent success rate for this guide, we've determined which South Beach parties will be mostly guido-free. The breed tends to gravitate towards loud, brash big-room EDM, like Armin Van Buuren's cheesy trance and David Guetta's commercial pop-house. Therefore, we can almost assure you that the following underground lineups will offer some major respite from guidohood during Ultra week.

Tuesday, March 22

Nic Fanciulli Presents Saved at SET
Featuring Nic Fanciulli, Matthias Tanzmann, Stacey Pullen, Tim Green, Gary Beck and Jordan Peak.

Wednesday, March 23

Bullitt Agency Mixer at Cameo
Featuring Audiofly (Anthony + Luca), Carlo Lio, Danny Howells, Darren Emerson, Davide Squillace, Dubfire, Jonathan Peters, Luca Bacchetti, Matthias Tanzmann, Miss Nine, Nic Fanciulli, Norman Doray, Satoshi Tomiie, Serge Devant, Shlomi Aber, Steve Duda, Tatiana Fontes, Tiefschwarz (Ali + Sante) and Umek.

Planet E & Desolat at Delano Hotel's Louis
Featuring Carl Craig, Loco Dice, Martin Buttrich, Stacey Pullen

Joris Voorn present Rejected at SET
Featuring Joris Voorn, 2000 and One, Edwin Oosterwal, Deetron and Maher Daniel.

Safe, Future Mob, and Supernature Music Present Flying Circus Miami 2011 at Nikki Beach
Featuring Audiofly, Lee Burridge, Nic Fanciulli, Davide Squillace, Radio Slave, Damian Lazarus, Jamie Jones, Matthias Tanzmann, Art Department, Matt Tolfrey, Guti (live), tINI, Luca Bacchetti, Alex Niggemann, Lazaro Casanova, Carola Pisaturo and Andres Dyer.

Thurs, March 24

15th Annual Ovum Party at Shelborne South Beach Resort
Featuring Josh Wink, Steve Bug, Nic Fanciulli, Gregor Tresher, Luca Bacchetti, Davide Squillace, Shlomi Aber, MANIK, Burnski, Droog and Jozif.

People Like Us Pool Party at The Surfcomber
Featuring Loco Dice, Davide Squillace, Seth Troxler, Martinez Brothers, Yaya, Guti, tINI, Livio & Roby and Paola Poletto

Proton Miami at Love Hate
Featuring Chris Fortier, Neil Quigley, Opencloud, Chava, Rollin Connection, Leland McWilliams and John Baugh.

Friday, March 25

Listed Plays It Safe at Victor Hotel
Featuring Clive Henry vs. Cassy, Dan Ghenacia vs. Shonky, Guti (live), Dory, Boris Werner, Matt Tolfrey, Craig Richards, Radio Slave, Lazaro Casanova, Inxec (live), Droog and Nikita.

Visionquest Feat. Seth Troxler, Guy Gerber and More at Shelborne South Beach Resort
Featuring Lee Curtiss, Ryan Crosson, Seth Troxler, Shaun Reeves, Guy Gerber, Benoit & Sergio, Footprintz and Tale Of Us.

Teksupport Presents: Hideout vs. Moon Harbour Recordings at The National Hotel
Featuring Dubfire, Matthias Tanzmann, Davide Squillace, Luca Bacchetti, Audiofly, Guti, Boris Werner, Carola Pisaturo, Luna City Express, Antonio Piacquadio and Dave Rosario.

Saturday, March 26th

Listed presents Diynamic vs. Cityfox
Featuring Stimming, Solomun, H.O.S.H., Lee Burridge, Ryan Crosson, Slow Hands
Deetron, Giorgio Roma vs Alex Dolby, Dory, Hoj, Naveen G

Sheik 'N' Beik Miami 2011 at Nikki Beach
Featuring Martin Buttrich (live), Behrouz, Matt Tolfrey vs. Inxec, Pablo Cahn-Speyer, Mikael Stavostrand (Miami exclusive), Sergio Santos, Nikko Gibler (live), Jeffrey Scott, Fong + Julio, Gil Montiel, Memek, Xander and Kimberly Kitty.

Teksupport Presents: The Sankeys Pool Party at The National Hotel
Featuring Antonio Piacquadio, Butch, Carlo Lio, Dave Rosario, Ellesse + Todd Terry (back to back), Nic Fanciulli, Paco Osuna, Steve Bug, The Martinez Brothers, Tiefschwarz + Sante (back to back.)

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