An Extremely Detailed Breakdown of Vanilla Ice Ripping a Giant Juggalo Bong

By Matt Preira Tue., Aug. 23 2011 at 10:30 AM

Vanilla Ice: Down with the clown and stony baloney.

Wanna get ripped like a juggalo? Meet the Ice Man at Seminole Casino's free Labor Day concert September 3.

Vanilla Ice is one chill dude.

He not only sang "Ice, Ice Baby." He also found a way to adapt it to nu-metal! Just imagine the stoner youth of America never having the opportunity to mosh to this completely necessary redux. Vanilla Ice's contribution to American culture is immeasurable.

Need more evidence the Ice Man is cooler than cool? Well, TMZ just released photos of the rapper and celebreality star taking a mammoth hit from a giant bong while onstage at the recent Gathering of the Juggalos.

Crossfade found the images so poignant, we felt it necessary to conduct an extremely detailed breakdown of Vanilla Ice's Insane Clown Posse-inspired public intoxication.

This image recalls Michelangelo's "The Creation of Adam." Only in this version, God is an anonymous gloved Juggalo, Adam is Vanilla Ice, and the gift of life has been exchanged for the gift of a five-foot, fully-loaded Juggabong.

Vanilla hypes his impending bong rip. What if every stoner had a hype man? Y'know, your boy on the mic, toasting the expensive, ridiculously large equipment you use to smoke marijuana.

And like a baby Juggalo sucking the rubber nipple on a nice warm bottle of Faygo, Vanilla Ice wraps his lips around the gargantuan water pipe and embraces the void.

Upon exhaling, he immediately starts coughing, prompting more than one face-painted Dark Carnie to exclaim, "My boy hasn't coughed like that since back in the day, yo!"

From the look on Vanilla's face, it's safe to assume that he's completely forgotten whatever it was he was saying and he's kinda freaking out, maannn. You'd get the fear too, if you were bliggity blitzed onstage in front of thousands of unwashed Midwestern clowns.

Chill Fest 2011 with Vanilla Ice. Saturday, September 3. Seminole Casino Hollywood, 4150 N. State Road 7, Hollywood. The show starts at 6 p.m. and it's free. Call 954-961-3220 or visit seminolehollywoodcasino.com.

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Chill Fest 2011, Gathering of the Juggalos, Juggalo, Vanilla Ice

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Just an After Thought.

this guy is the host of the coconut grove bed race. what will the idiots on the city council say or do about is. marc sarnoff is the guy trying to clean up the grove by stopping alcohol sales at 3 am instead of 5am. He also broke the law with his dual residences/business next door to each other. if new times want to do something cool the should bring this to attention and do an expose about all that stuff get ice to call out sarnoff. ice vs sarnoff. the same way they did when they got behind luke for mayor. or not.......

rick d

vanilla ice, reppin' miami lakes 2 da fullest

David Josef Tamargo

Working at the Gathering of the Juggalos 2001 - 2007 I have similar photos posted online for nearly a decade of Vanilla Ice hitting the bong... what's the big deal?

Randj91

people that aren't on the inside like us don't know what the fuck is going on thats why its news to them. they assume because they don't listen to vanilla ice anymore that he's washed up and doesn't make music anymore. the problem with the mainstream is they think everyone will follow them and like whatever they say is good. fuck that bullshit.http://www.reverbnation.com/ra...

please fan me here.FREE COLLABS DAMN IT LETS DO THE DAMN THING!!!!!!!!!! send tracks with only my parts blank to my email at randj91@yahoo.com and i'll probably get you on one of my tracks as well even if it is just as a shout out.

thanks again.Randy-J. click my like button and join my mailing list here on facebook.http://www.reverbnation.com/randyj91