An Ode to Jessica Simpson's Boobs
Categories: Useless Lists
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| Via Maxim Magazine |
| Jess, don't ever get your boobs reduced. They're beautiful. |
But as of late, the 31-year old pop star's celebrity status has been reduced to headlining Chili Cook Offs and PBS Christmas specials--a far cry from a prime-time reality show slot on MTV in the early 2000s, and multi-platinum record sales.
She'd damn near fallen off Crossfade's radar for good until we heard a rumor that the platinum blonde was getting a breast reduction. Thankfully, however, it wasn't true.
"I LOVE MY BOOBIES!!", Simpson tweeted, "They aren't going anywhere!"
Phew. What a relief, Jess. We love your boobies too. In fact, we've compiled our favorite Jessica Simpson boobs videos after the jump.
Brunette Boobs
God bless the paparazzi. Jesus Christ Jessica, you're looking dangerously hot walking 'round Los Angeles, wearing that incredibly low cut top, and letting that double D rack breathe.
Daisy Boob
How you were passed up by the Academy for your role in Daisy Duke is beyond us. We totally campaigned for a Best Supporting Top category, but the Oscar voting committee ignored our e-mails.
Daytime Boob
Holy shit. We're totally thinking of quitting our job as music bloggers and applying for the position of "guy who puts mic on guests" on the Ellen show.
Late Night Side-Boob
If you were Jay's guest every night, and wore that dress on every appearance, the big-chinned talk show host would never have to worry about ratings again.
Bouncy Beach Boobs
Need we say more.
Glad you're keeping the girls, Jess.
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