Dress Like LMFAO: A Five-Point, Party-Rocking Fashion Guide for Being a 100% Organic Douche
3. Coif City Bitch
You've got to do something with that mop on top. For classic LMFAO swag, let your curls get crazy and tease them locks till you look like a kid playing with a fork in an electrical socket. If frizz ain't your scene, use enough gel to create a geometrical wonder. Just make sure you look like you're being perpetually shaken by earth-shattering bass.
2. Accessory Necessities
Decorate yourself with all sorts of LED-studded neon goodies. It'll take your Party Rock look to the next level. For starters, a great pair of hater blockers is more than necessary. Don't bother unless they're giant and bedazzled. It's always good to go with a wristband, but only on one arm, please. Rock a few gold chains, let them hang low, and promise the bitch she can wear them when y'all knock moon boots later.
1. It's All in the Details
Of course, dressing the part is only the beginning.The little things separate the true party rockers from the posers. Be sure you're covered in sweat and alcohol stains. Let a little bit of questionable powder linger at the corners of your nostrils. Stare off with your glazed, red eyes at nothing in particular. And whenever possible, don't speak, just burp.
Now, look in the mirror. Do you look like the sort of person that would sing about doing drugs and fucking bitches with their uncle for millions of dollars? Is that creepy? Are you too drunk to respond? Then you're ready to go.
LMFAO's Sorry for Party Rocking 2012 tour with Far East Movement, The Quest Crew, Sidney Samson, and others. Friday, June 22. American Airlines Arena, 601 Biscayne Blvd., Miami. The show starts at 7 p.m. and tickets cost $35 to $69.50 plus fees via ticketmaster.com. Call 786-777-1000 or visit aaarena.com.
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