Ten Reasons EDM Is the Wimpiest Youth Culture Movement Ever
Speaking of growing up, you have a child's soother in your mouth. Are you surprised security groped you inappropriately? You might as well write "drug user" on your forehead. Why can't you just settle for gum like a normal person? Would you let your baby brother see you like this? Seriously, here is a mirror. Wallow in shame.
When rappers drink codeine syrup and soda, it makes them lean and look like gangstas. When there are two Vicks Inhalers shoved into your nostrils, you just look like you suffered serious cranial damage as a child, and your mom didn't love you enough to take you to a doctor. Your stupid mask doesn't look cool, either. You're not a ninja turtle, because ninja turtles can beat people up. You're happy beating yourself up with these over-the-counter brain neutralizers.