Miami's Ten Best Hip-Hop Clubs

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Photo by Jacob Katel

As 305 maestro Pitbull boasts on "Welcome to Miami" (Dat Lil Chico's edition of Jermaine Dupri's infectious ATL anthem): "Y'all got Uncle Sam, we got Uncle Luke."

Mr. Worldwide is damn right. Ever since the early days of Luke's booty bass, The Magic City has been an X-rated paradise full of fast beats, fast women, and even faster cars.

And you haven't made it in the rap world until you can unapologetically gloat, like Lil Wayne, "South Beach, Miami, ho, I'm probably with Tammy Toe." Or as Weezy once said elsewhere, "Nigga! LIV on Sundays! King of Diamonds Monday!"

Now in honor of Dade County's irrepressible desire to shake its giant culo at the club to any and every bass-heavy banger, we here at Crossfade have compiled a list of Miami's ten best rap clubs.

See also:
-Miami's Ten Best Hipster Bars

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Photo by Jacob Katel

10. Mansion
We know, it's just another pricey South Beach nightlife emporium. But here is an undeniable fact: If you grew up in Miami, and you like to shake that ass, you've either been to Mansion or waited hours in line just trying to get a taste. It's a Memorial Day Weekend must (tag teams like DJ Khaled and Rick Ross, Meek Mill and Ace Hood, and Lil Wayne and Birdman all threw parties at the spot this year), and that signature "Naughty Girls Enter Here" sign in the club foyer is just begging the ladies for a lil' twerk.

9. LIV
"How much for a table?" an inquisitive, gaudily-dressed European asks a bouncer at LIV while waiting in line to enter the Fontainebleau's fanciest club. "'Bout $800 to $1000, dude," the hard-bodied guard in black replies. That's when Euro guy gives up. He's not getting in tonight to see J.Cole for two reasons: one, he doesn't have a vagina, and two, he's stone broke. This is a familiar scene at the 'Bleau party palace. If you're not a rich boy with scantily-clad floozies on your arm, see ya later. And though a lot of grandiose SoBe clubs with similar gimmicks have blown up LIV's spot, it's still an upscale nightlife king. Shit, it's where Coolio is celebrating his 50th birthday, Lil Jon frequently drops that crunk, and Lil Wayne regularly runs Sunday nights. What more could y'all ask for?!

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2 comments
josh2050s
josh2050s

fatalartzmanagement artist coming soon. for mixing and recording contact info@fatalartzmanagement.com booking

Valerie Hower
Valerie Hower

dang I have not been to any of these.... what is wrong with me? ;)

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