Thanksgiving 2013: Miami's Best Parties
It's not easy dancing with a turkey on your head. Or three pounds of marshmallow yams in your belly. Or an ass so fat, it's literally full of cranberry sauce.
But c'mon, people, there ain't no party like a Thanksgiving party. Because while grandma definitely won't appreciate you getting waste-y off pumpkin pie ale and dancing on the dinner table, we here at Crossfade consider that to be a perfectly traditional expression of gratitude for this year's bountiful harvest.
Anyway, here are Miami's six best Thanksgiving 2013 parties.
White Trash Turkey Bash. With Damaged Goods and BOE. Presented by Fever Tuesdays. Tuesday, November 26, 10 p.m., SET, 320 Lincoln Rd., Miami Beach; 305-531-2800; setmiami.com. For table reservations, call 786-735-1900. Ages 21 and up. How does white trash celebrate Thanksgiving? A deep-fried bird, three boxes of Stove Top stuffing, cranberry sauce from a can, a milk-fed kitchen maid in daisy dukes with all-natural boobies, and a $300 bottle of bourbon in the SoBe VIP ... Obviously.
Perky Turkey. With CX, Zea, Killa KA5, Joey Tracks, Beat Mekanix, Rob Vanz, and George Andreas. Wednesday, November 27, 10 p.m., Fifty at the Viceroy Hotel, 485 Brickell Ave., Miami; 305-503-4417; viceroymiami.com. Tickets cost $10 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. If Mr. Perky Turkey knew that he's gonna be plucked and stuffed and sizzling at 325 degrees tomorrow, then dude probably wouldn't be feeling so cheerful. But tonight, he's still feathered and having fun with DJs. Gobble, gobble, gobble, bro.