Coachella 2014: Ten Signs You're Too Old for This Shit

Thumbnail image for old-man-coachella
Chris Victorio/OC Weekly
You tell 'em, Grandpa!

Age, of course, is a state of mind. But it's easy to feel like you've aged 30 years after three busy days at Coachella.

Whether you've gone to the festival since the first year in 1999 or just started going a few years ago, the festival can feel a bit, well, different than when you were in your teens and 20s.

If so, you might want to check and see if you just might be getting too old for this shit.

See also: Coachella 2014's 50 Most Beautiful People

coachella-magnifying.jpg

10. You Need A Magnifying Glass to Read the Damn Lineup Poster
OK, is it just you? Or does the last few lines of the lineup keep getting more and more impossible to read? No, it must just be your browser, right?

9. Who The Hell Are These People?
When you're finally able to decipher the bands billed in smaller font in the line up, you find yourself saying, "Who??" more than usual. There was a day when you were a huge fan of even the itty bitty bands billed on the last line (see: The Killers circa 2004, The Locust circa 2005, The Avett Brothers circa 2007, Deadmau5 circa 2008). Now, the acts you're most excited for could easily be seen on VH1 Classic. What's a STRFKR, anyway?

8. Strollerchella
Once upon a time, the only person you were forced to babysit at Coachella was your friend who decided to take acid and ecstasy at once. But these days you're busy taking care of that tiny human you made smooshing your crotches with the good-looking kid you met at the Do Lab a few years prior.

See also: Coachella 2014's Worst Moments


My Voice Nation Help
1 comments

Now Trending

Miami Concert Tickets

From the Vault

 

Events

Loading...