Vanilla Ice on Almost Dying, Joining the Juggalos, and "Living the American Dream"

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Photo by C. Stiles

"Yesterday's history, tomorrow's a mystery."

He spent his teens break-dancing on the streets of Dallas and busting moves in Miami malls. He snagged a string of motocross championships. He learned to beatbox and rhyme.

And then he became the most famous rapping white boy in the world.

See also: Review & Photos: Vanilla Ice, Juggalos, and Hot Mamis Rage at the Zoo: "Word to Your Mother, Miami!"

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Vanilla Ice Headlining Miami New Times' Brew at the Zoo 2014

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"Yo, VIP," and also general admission peeps, "Let's kick it!"

That's right ... New Times' Brew at the Zoo is back with a brand-new announcement.

For the 2014 edition of our annual sudsy romp at Zoo Miami, we've enlisted Vanilla Ice to "rock a mic like a vandal, light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle" as the musical headliner for Miami's largest beer festival.

After all, we too live by Mr. Ice's oft-repeated motto: "Anything less than the best is a felony."

See also: Vanilla Ice on Almost Dying, Joining the Juggalos, and "Living the American Dream"

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Tootsie's Girls and a Sexy 88-Year-Old Buzzard Talk Streaking at Brew at the Zoo

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Photo by Laurie Charles
Meet Bob Beck, the 88-year-old Sexy Old Buzzard.

Bearded brewski lovers, former college frat boys, tatted ex-military men, girls walking around in red Tootsie's t-shirts promoting the strip club, and an 88-year old man cruising around on a walker ... Welcome to Miami New Times' Brew at the Zoo.

Over the weekend, the booze fest attracted an unlikely group of people to Zoo Miami for a night of beer, food, music, and debauchery.

See also:
-Brew at the Zoo 2013 at Zoo Miami: The 74-Photo Slideshow
-Girl Flashes Boobs for Uncle Luke, Naughty by Nature, and Brew at the Zoo!

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Girl Flashes Boobs for Uncle Luke, Naughty by Nature, and Brew at the Zoo!

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Photo by Liliana Mora
Naughty by Nature's Treach taming the wild beasts of Brew at the Zoo.

Big-booty girls backing that ass up onstage with Uncle Luke and bros wearing shorts, screen T's, and neon orange, green, and yellow sunglasses while dancing to Naughty by Nature were the kind of animals that filled the grounds of Zoo Miami for Miami New Times' Brew at the Zoo.

Luke, Naughty, and Pangea Tribe provided the soundtrack as beer-fed party people took a break from all that Sam Adams and brewskies from the Homebrew Alley to jam to some old-school tracks.

See also:
-Uncle Luke's Top Ten Booty Jams of All Time
-Brew at the Zoo 2013 at Zoo Miami: The 74-Photo Slideshow
-Naughty by Nature Talks Partying With Uncle Luke and Drinking Brew at the Zoo


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Naughty by Nature Talks Partying With Uncle Luke and Drinking Brew at the Zoo

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Who's ready for the perfect party?

Because Naughty by Nature and Uncle Luke are "gonna make it happen" at Miami New Times' Brew at the Zoo.

In fact, we here at Crossfade just chatted with Naughty's Vin Rock. And he insists that we don't wanna "mess 'round with Naughty by Nature and Uncle Luke" unless we're prepared to get drunk, wrestle wild animals, and shake ass in public.

See also:
-Naughty By Nature's Vin Rock on the Right to Bear Arms: "Along Comes the KKK with Guns, and All You Had Was a Bat?"
-Uncle Luke's Top Ten Booty Jams of All Time

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Uncle Luke's Top Ten Booty Jams of All Time

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Before Luther Campbell was Uncle Luke, he was Luke Skyywalker. But George Lucas sued him for violating copyright. And that's how the nasty boy went from car wars to Star Wars.

The Lucas lawsuit was just the beginning of his infamy. Soon, Miami bass became the trunk rattle heard 'round the world. It started with the party crew that Luke ran with, Ghetto Style DJs. Later, alongside his 2 Live Crew homies, Luke fought and won a major free-speech battle for all Americans.

Nobody shakes their ass to the Constitution, though. So here are his ten most significant contributions to booty music.

See also:
-Uncle Luke and Naughty by Nature Headlining New Times' Brew at the Zoo 2013
-Naughty by Nature Talks Partying With Uncle Luke and Drinking Brew at the Zoo

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Uncle Luke and Naughty by Nature Headlining New Times' Brew at the Zoo 2013

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The godfather of booty, Luther "Uncle Luke" Campbell.
Anything goes in the wild. Especially when beer is involved.

An unlimited supply of more than 100 domestic, international, and microbrew beers, to be exact. And live appearances by Miami's own booty pioneer and a Grammy-winning hip-hop group.

At least that is what will go down in the wild of the Miami New Times' Brew at the Zoo.

See also:
-Naughty by Nature Talks Partying With Uncle Luke and Drinking Brew at the Zoo
-Uncle Luke's Top Ten Booty Jams of All Time


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