In sickness and in health, count on Justin Bieber to stand by his allegedly on-and-off-again lady tiger, Selena Gomez.

Biebz spent part of his Monday outside of a Reseda, California hospital waiting for Gomez to undergo a 20-minute medical examination, according to Extra. Naturally, the hospital visit has triggered a number of rumors as to what's really going on with "Jelena."

Are they expecting a child together? Did Bieber catch an STD from a groupie and pass it along to Gomez? Or is she suffering from a sore throat because of too much, um, singing?

Find out after the cut.

See also:
-Justin Bieber Pukes on Stage!
-Justin Bieber's Fans Want To Breathe His Farts, Shower In His Vomit
-Justin Bieber's Sex Tape: An Extremely Detailed Breakdown
-Justin Bieber Breaks Up With Selena Gomez, Begins Dark 10-Part Downward Spiral

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Sooo booored.

What does Kanye West have in common with every other man on the planet who is not having sex with a Kardashian? Exactly ... He thinks they're all boooring.

West was photographed straight snoozing at a London nightclub this past weekend as girlfriend Kim Kardashian gossiped about God-knows-what with some artsy-type dude in horn-rimmed glasses.

According to Media Takeout, "Kim was so boring" that Yeezy "fell asleep on her."

Do you think Kanye's getting tired of his "Perfect Bitch?"

Take our poll after the cut.

See also:
-Kanye West's Dating Kim Kardashian, Threatens Chris Humphries on New Song
-Kanye West Calls Kim Kardashian "Perfect Bitch," Plus Five Other Adorable Rap Pet Names
-Kanye West and Kim Kardashian Moving Into $10-Million Miami Mansion!?
-Kanye West, Kim Kardashian, Hulk Hogan, and Halloween on South Beach: A Six-Photo Recap

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Emetophiles (i.e vomit fetishists) are having the best month ever, and there are still 23 days left in October!

Last week, Justin Bieber spewed chunks twice while on stage in Arizona during the kickoff to his Believe tour. And this weekend, Lady Gaga one-upped the Biebz by barfing thrice during a gig in Spain.

Maybe there's a wacky stomach flu that only affects folks with superactive Twitter accounts. After all, Mother Monster and JB are one and two, respectively, in terms of followers.

You're next, Katy Perry.

See also:
-Justin Bieber Pukes on Stage!
-Lady Gaga Reveals Struggles With Bulimia: "I Threw Up All the Time"
-Lady Gaga Stinks Like FAME: An Extremely Detailed Breakdown
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America's favorite "fucking fairground stripper" and the country's most prolific pop monster may soon share a stage.

According to E! News, Madonna recently told an Atlantic City concert crowd that she loves Lady Gaga, dedicating "Masterpiece" to Mother Monster and hinting a potential collaboration.

"Imitation is the highest form of flattery," Madge said. "But one day, very soon, we're going to be on stage together. Just you wait. You think I'm kidding? I love Lady Gaga."

See also:
-Madonna Announces 2012 World Tour
-Madonna's Five Best Beefs of 2012
-Madonna Crashes Avicii's Set at Ultra 2012, Namedrops Ecstasy, Shakes "Meaty ASS"
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Fiddy and Floyd: Happier times.

Even though their raging bromance seems to be fizzling, 50 Cent recently told radio jock Rickey Smiley that he and Floyd Mayweather were "always [going to] be cool." And until this morning, we believed him.

But then Fiddy turned his back on Money and ventured into enemy territory with the best Filipino fighter in boxing, Manny Pacquiao.

So clearly, 50 Cent and Mayweather aren't that cool.

According to Boxing Scene, Curtis Jackson and the Pac Man are "moving forward" with plans to develop a collaborative boxing promotions company, uniting the MC's TMT Promotions and the world champion's MP Promotions.

The kicker? Mayweather was supposed to be a part of the deal too. But evidently, plans have changed.

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See also "Miley Cyrus to Tyler The Creator: 'My Barber Couldn't Even Come Close to the F#$% Job That Is Your Face.'"

Miley Cyrus isn't even old enough to drink.

But the former Disney star isn't letting that stop her from singing about wine.

Yesterday, the 19-year-old singer dropped a cover version of James Shelton's 1950 song, "Lilac Wine," on her official YouTube channel via the brand new mileycyrus.com.

And refreshingly, it ain't half band.

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See also "Hank Williams Jr. on Obama: 'Muslim President Who Hates U.S. and We Hate Him.'"

Hank Williams Jr. hates Barack Obama. And he also made it abundantly clear this past weekend that he's not fond of Muslims, homosexuals, or anyone who isn't a cowboy.

But the former Monday Night Football theme song singer and longtime advocate of ignorance and bigotry hasn't said anything about Alec Baldwin, who called Williams "racist" on Twitter last night.

"I think we need to call Hank Williams Jr what he is," Baldwin tweeted. "A broken-down, senile, racist coot."

Harsh words, but do you agree? Take our poll after the cut.

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See also "Ten Most Musical Politicians Ever: Barry Obama, Mitt the Mormon Honky, and Others!"

Mitt Romney's got the look.

His teeth ... They're perfect. That hair ... So nice. And those crisp, custom-tailored suits ... Dude's totally a shoe-in for the presidency, right?

No. Because underneath that veil of prototypical political branding (and empty promises), Mitt Romney's a heartless bastard who literally strapped his dog, Seamus, to the roof of his station wagon and drove 12 hours to Canada in the early '80s.

But every dog has its day, and Seamus--though no longer with us--is finally getting back at Mittens with a little help from New Wave legends Devo.

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Founding 'N SYNC member Chris Kirkpatrick meets Mac & Cheese.

JC, Joey, Justin, Lance, and ... Um, who's the fifth guy?

Oh, right, Chris! And good news for Captain Kirkpatrick's legion of followers: Aside from a from a torn ACL in his left knee, the former 'N SYNC countertenor is alive and well, seemingly pushing toward a monumental comeback that'll have Justin Timberlake second-guessing his 2002 decision to leave the boy band and pursue a solo career.

The 40-year-old Kirkpatrick is scheduled to DJ a "Mac & Cheese" dance party at an Orlando bar tonight, preceded by a half-hour "meet and greet" with a gaggle of fans.

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Forget the Bluth family banana stand, there's always money in the boxing ring.

Manny Pacquiao raked in a $26 million purse plus a heavy share of the pay-per-view profits in his loss against Timothy Bradley earlier this month, and Floyd "Money" Mayweather banked at least $32 million when he fought Miguel Cotto in May.

But the million-dollar paychecks aren't exclusive to professional fighters, even celebrities boxers can walk away with a fat check if they agree to duke it out in the ring, like Drake and Chris Brown.

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