Top 2010 Films vs. the Ones You Actually Watched
Here is the ten best 2010 films:
1. Trash Humpers: When this Harmony Korine film screened locally for the Miami International Film festival, according to our music editor, people walked out only to be booed by a small posse of weirdo punks.
2. Greenberg: Ben Stiller escapes nights in museums and focker name-calling. The result? Tre sad.
3. Daddy Longlegs: Another movie about a major-league fuck-up who gives Stiller's Greenberg some competition in the Academy Awards of depressing.
4. Dogtooth: An erotic horror film about ass-backwards semantics and girl-on-girl action.
5. Somewhere: This film follows in the footsteps of other Sofia Copola projects. It's about a bad-boy, living in excess, who encounters a thoughtful, independent young lady. If Bill Murray is not doing karaoke in this one, we're not sure we're on board.
6. The Red Chapel: A faux Danish theater troupe tries to punk North Korea. Seriously.
7. Everyone Else: Worst-case scenario for a vacation? That all the seclusion and dedicated us-time directs a magnifying glass over a couple's shortcomings. Let's hope it's more fun to watch than to experience.
8. Shutter Island: Could it be? A Hollywood blockbuster on the Best Film list? A freaky murderess escapes from the loony bin, and we were too chicken shit to find out how that all went down.
9. The Ghost Writer: A Roman Polanski film so good that it makes you forget he raped a little girl. Zing!
10. Enter the Void: With this one, director Gasper Noe provides a winning formula: drugs, ghosts, and Tokyo nightlife.
And now, for the shit you actually paid to see in theaters. Here are the highest-grossing films from 2010 (as of December 21). Notice the complete lack of overlap with the above. Do you guys have really shitty taste in flicks? Or are critics just pretentious pricks looking for a detour to sad-town?
1. Toy Story 3
2. Alice in Wonderland
4. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1
5. Shrek Forever After
6. The Twilight Saga: Eclipse
7. Iron Man 2
8. Despicable Me
9. Clash of the Titans
10. How to Train Your Dragon
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