The Ten Kinkiest Things to Do at Exxxotica (NSFW)

Exxxotica

Ride 'em, cowgirls.

Exxxotica, the biggest sex convention in the country, is back in Miami this week. And if you've attended before, you know that this show can be full-blown, balls to the wall (or in your face) nutso. There's so much skin, so many toys, and sadly, so little time. The event runs just three days, so to get your maximum amount of freak on, you're going to have to go in with a game plan. One more detailed than "buy tickets, walk around, stare at boobies."

Luckily for you, we're here to point you in the right direction when it comes to understanding the ins and outs -- ahem -- of this sex bonanza. Here are the top 10 kinkiest things to do at Exxxotica. Use these suggestions wisely.

Wikipedia

Strive to do better.

10. Join the majors
So you've made some homemade sex tapes. (Hopefully, of a better quality than that Kardashian crap.) You think they're pretty good, and you're wondering: Could you cut it as a pro? If your dirty little mind is headed down that dark hallway, Exxxotica has just the thing for you: Breaking Into The Biz: A How-To Guide To Getting Into The Adult Industry.

Flickr mueredecine

Scare flicks yield the best screamers.

9. Fake It
If you're a bedroom faker, we don't judge. After all, you're only trying to sustain his self-esteem. But if you've perfected those skills to the point where your significant other is in awe of his own abilities, the Screaming O Orgasm contest might be for you. Ladies, get loud and proud! (And then teach your partner some skills, seriously.)