In Case You Missed It: ShamWow Guy Vince Shlomi's Schticky Commercial References His Violent Miami Past

Prior to 2009, "Headset Vince's" main claim to fame was mesmerizing a shop-happy public into scooping up ShamWows and SlapChops. His manic, crackhead-esque charm (er, "charm") convinced thousands of housewives that they couldn't live without his absorbent towelettes and sharpened blades.

Then, on February 9, 2009, Shlomi was booked for allegedly roughing up a prostitute after she "bit his tongue and would not let go." Since then, he's been little more than fodder for Internet humorists.

But apparently, the Schticky can solve all your messy problems -- even the ones related to your tawdry criminal record. The commercial's been around since January, according to YouTube, but we just recently noticed it popping up on local stations. Apparently, the Schticky cleans up after your "shedding pussy" and allows wives to "schtick" it to their fat, lazy husbands. Just try to count the number of sexual euphemisms spouting from the decidedly un-sexy Shlomi in the video after the jump. Shudder.