Emmys 2012: The Real Winners and Losers

Photo by PictureGroup, via Emmys.com

Louis CK and Amy Poehler: Winning?

It's mere hours after the 2012 Emmy Awards ended last night, and the whole world has already rehashed the fashion, debated the credibility of the award winners and lamented the poor luck of the shmucks who got all gussied up and excited, only to watch someone else take home the statue. There was glitz! There were jokes! There were emotional speeches!

To all of which we say: Meh.

We get that the awards are important to Hollywood, but for the rest of us, the Emmys exist as a form of voyeuristic entertainment -- who's looking the best, who manages to be genuinely funny, and who, well, doesn't. So that's how we've determined our own set of winners and losers from last night's telecast.

The best, the brightest, and the bombs, after the jump.

Winners



Amy Poehler
The whole world had a front-row seat to the Poehler Sideboob Party last night, and nobody was complaining, because the woman is a national treasure and we should worship all parts of her, including her reasonable amounts of cleavage. Plus, her mixed-up acceptance speech bit with Julia Louis-Dreyfus ensured that she still won the stage, if not the category.

Damon Wayans Jr and James Van Der Beek
The show was already dragging when these guys hustled out to say yet another hokey joke and give out another award. Luckily, they knew what was really important, announcing the score of the NFL Sunday Night game between the New England Patriots and the Baltimore Ravens.

Ricky Gervais
Hey, look, they let him back on live TV! He's still a dick -- telling the audience that he hoped Louis CK would win and effectively dulling the real winner's moment -- but you've gotta admire his consistency.

Louis CK
Louis CK won two Emmys last night. He also just wins at life.