The Real Housewives of Miami, Episode Eight: Bras, Broads and Bitch Slaps

Categories: Film and TV
We think it's safe to say that Real Housewives of Miami is finally starting to heat up. On last night's special Sunday edition, there were cocktails, violence, and nip slips -- oh my! What more could you ask from a Real Housewives franchise? (Not much.)

We mean, even Lady Gaga was tweeting about the show. Does this mean we can start referring to the cast as "Miami's little monsters"?

The show kicks off with the ladies at Lisa Hochstein's lingerie party for breast cancer. Like most Miami soirees, there is quite the motley crew of guests. We have the entire cast of ladies, of course. But the guest list of men was interesting. You had Elaine Lancaster out of drag, Girl's Gone Wild's Joe Francis (ugh), and some man named Beau Beasely. We aren't sure exactly who or what he is doing there, but he was a guest of Karent Sierra. And he was pretty annoying from the start, so we're sure those two will get along swimmingly.

To kick things off, Marta Krupa finally admits that she slept with Joe Francis. Hey, we all make mistakes, even if they are of the "filthiest male genitalia on the planet" variety. For her safety and everyone around her, we surely hope she used a condom or three.

Despite her sordid past, though, Marta is definitely our new favorite honorary Housewife. She's always a hot drunken mess. We can relate.

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