Dear Santa: 13 Snarky Scenes From Santa's Enchanted Forest
This is 2012. Freakish is the new normal, just ask Lady Gaga.
The Circus Freaks
This gives me the warm fuzzies. The light displays are by far my favorite part of your forest. More of these please.
I suspect that fried candy bars, elephant ears and chicharonnes are the reason your BMI is 35. If you ever want to fit down another chimney, stick to carrot sticks and celery.
As a side note, you can catch me on "Best Thing I've Ever Eaten" recounting my experience with your fried Snickers. Nom nom nom.
Please free my wild brothers and sisters - the grizzly bears, the Bengal tiger, the reindeer and the petting zoo crew. Otherwise, we will unleash raccoon-style revenge on your ass.
The Raccoons That Live in Tropical Park