Five Things Not to Do on a First Date
2. Don't Bring You Baggage with You
Noel Zia Lee / Flickr
We all have baggage. The girl who dumped you out of blue last year still lingers in your heart. The guy(s) who said they would call, but never even sent a Facebook message.
Putting yourself out there isn't easy, and there will always be risks for your heart. But if you continue to carry that old baggage, you'll only experience more of the old patterns you've been trying to avoid.
Even if you don't speak one word of your last heartbreak, the energy you bring and the assumptions you carry will sabotage your date. Just imagine if you would go into the date without the assumption that all girls are gold-diggers and all guys have Peter Pan syndrome. Wouldn't that relieve you of so much stress? Can't you just imagine how much lighter you would feel if you would drop that baggage? You may actually be able to enjoy yourself! And who knows, your date may be someone way different than you imagined -- in a good way. If you want any chance at a second date, leave your baggage at the door.
3. Don't Talk Too Much
Hi, my name is Nikki Novo, and I am a recovering over-sharer. Many of us tend to talk a lot just because we're nervous or to avoid any gaps of silence. Can you think of anything worse than a gap of silence? Awk-ward.
The problem with talking too much on a first date is not just for obvious reasons, but because you're missing out on getting to know the person on the other side of the table. And isn't that what makes these sometimes torturous outings worthwhile?
Another reason you want to avoid spilling the beans is because you want to remain a bit of a mystery. There's no fun in reading an entire book in one sitting. The best is that time in between your next sitting, when you can't stop thinking about the novel's characters because you're dying to know more. Think about it.
An lastly, there's no better way to avoid the post-date hangover than if while on your date you made mindful conversation. Meaning, you didn't just speak to speak. Your words had meaning and substance.