A Single's Guide to Surviving Wedding Season
Each week, Miami dating expert Nikki Novo gives us advice on finding love in this hopeless place. Today: How to get through this year's barrage of other people's wedding bliss.
After months of dressing your fridge with a collection of heart-shaped save the date cards and magnets of happy couples, the time has finally arrived: wedding season.
Not since Valentine's Day have you harped on the fact that you're single. But with a marathon of monopolized weekends, pricey gifts, and kissy Champagne toasts ahead, you can't help but feel bad about your relationship status week after week. And that tiny rsvp box isn't helping either. Are you bringing a plus one? Will you have any prospects by the time the event rolls around? Should you go stag with the hopes of meeting someone? Should you go at all?
Well, here's one piece of literature that was created just for you. As you prepare yourself for a calendar filled with painful blind setups and cold chicken, take a look at our guide for surviving wedding season. There's no mention of catching the bouquet. Promise.
1. Go in with the Right Mindset
Sean Molin Photography / Flickr CC
It's easy to get caught up in your own single situation every time an invitation comes in the mail, but as harsh as this may sound: these weddings are not about you. They're about your friends and family members who have hopefully found a wonderful life partner. They want to celebrate, and they want you to be there with them.
While their love might open some unhealed wounds for you, do your best to be genuinely happy for them. You would want the same if it were your wedding. And, honestly, the only way you're going to attract goodness in your life is if you see it and appreciate it when it happens to others. Just because their time has come, it doesn't mean yours will never arrive. You have to believe it to see it. I believe it.
2. To Plus One or Not to Plus One
This is definitely a controversial topic. Most wedding etiquette experts will tell you not to subject the bride and the groom to the cost of your plus one unless your guest is someone significant.
I personally feel this is an individual decision. If it's a family wedding and you feel comfortable hanging with mom, dad, and cousins, then don't subject yourself or anyone else to the awkwardness of a random plus one. But if it's a co-worker's big day and you won't know anyone else there but the bride, sourcing date prospects a few months in advance isn't a bad idea.
Most of us want to have a date only to feel like we belong. We all long to belong, and fitting in with the crowd of couples satisfies our need. But listen to me: you do belong, no matter what. Your friends with significant others attending the event love you regardless of your relationship status. And good friends will make you feel comfortable if you decide to go stag. If they don't, well, it's time for new friends.
Bottom line: don't feel obligated to make a decision that doesn't make you feel comfortable.