Ten Miami Gay Guys You've Probably Dated

Categories: LBGT, Lists, Opinion

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Flickr.com/ EricTriou
4. Mr. Drag Race Hopeful
There are only a few people who should be called queen: Beyoncé, Madonna, Cher. According to your new boo, he belongs on that list too. You know you like men, but for some reason his wearing of wedges, women's jeans, and more makeup than Kim Kardashian gets you all hot and bothered.

In a weird way, Mr. Hopeful is kind of a simple being. Though he loves extravagance, all he needs is Forever 21, a full-length mirror, and a stage to be happy in this world. He is the simplest yet most complicated person you have ever met. Let's just put it this way: You are dating RuPaul, but with a fraction of the money.

Speaking of money, he might need to borrow some. Unless he wins Miss'd America, you can expect to meet Max. (Max is the limit on your credit card. With Mr. Hopeful's love for wigs, you two are sure to cross paths.)

3. Mr. Circuit Party
White Party, Muscle Beach, Miami Beach Gay Pride -- the list of parties on this man's social calendar could go on for days. If there is one thing this man loves, it's dancing -- well, dancing, taking off his shirt, dropping some casual drugs; you know the drill. Nothing gets his blood pumping like EDM; a gaggle of sweaty, shirtless men; and a circuit party.

Let's face it: Mr. Circuit Party is the Miley Cyrus of your life. You've never had more fun with anyone, ever. If he isn't twerking at a major event, he's texting his whole address book and searching the listings looking for a place to go. But when he blacks out, causes a scene, and gets thrown out by an oh-so-scary Score bouncer, you're gonna want to run Forrest Gump-style.

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5 comments
Fernando Buch
Fernando Buch

Lol. Proud to be a Mr. Espn/fight for your rights.

alex.wall
alex.wall

Alright, now where's the lesbian list?

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