Ten Dating Do's and Don'ts for Men in Miami

Categories: Culture

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Big Al/Flickr
Dating in Miami. It's a bitch, ain't it? These days it seems like everyone is just concerned with getting it in... and in.... and in. Aren't we all exhausted already? Sure, your latest weekend conquest makes for a pretty epic story to tell your fellas, until you realize two weeks later that said chick totally gave you the herpy derp. While we sympathize with the struggle of finding a quality gal pal in the 305, it's not entirely impossible, especially if you're bringing your A game and adhering to our Miami dating do's and don'ts. This must be the hopeless place Rihanna was singing about, but one where love can be found just the same.

See also: Ten Dating Do's and Don'ts for Women in Miami

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Take notes, guys.
10. Do act like a gentleman.
This doesn't necessarily mean opening doors and pulling out chairs and throwing your coat over puddles for the lady in your life (although it doesn't hurt). It means not acting like a feral animal when you're in her presence.

9. Don't expect to smash because of it.
Congratulations on behaving like a decent human being! Think of it as making your momma proud and not as a one-way ticket to Slamville. If you're that desperate, we hear the girls don't wear bloomers at La Covacha.

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29 comments
Muse TD
Muse TD

I agree with most of those.

John Kilzi
John Kilzi

The "who she be with" is a Biggie reference. Jeez, get with it, people! Shitty article, but I like song lyric references cuz I start singing it lol

David Oves
David Oves

Was this written as a community service project in a Hialeah high school? Sayings like, "who she be with...ain't no body", just aren't what you would call, "journalism"....and second of all, who would want to date this hood girl? No wonder she's having dating issues

Alex Anico
Alex Anico

I've come to realize dating in Miami is one big don't...

Javy Pino
Javy Pino

"Who she be with?" Really.... Who wrote this lol

Muri Alvarez
Muri Alvarez

Ivonne Perez Suarez Raquel Zuniga Maggie Anzardo

Danny Diaz
Danny Diaz

John P Conley *fist bump* homie!!

John P Conley
John P Conley

I had a feeling Danny Diaz would have something to say about this one. I'm with you brotha!!

Scott Seabiscuit Mislan
Scott Seabiscuit Mislan

Has nothing to do with Miami. Isn't really even very helpful. Tries to be comedic and fails at that too. Oh, it's the NEW TIMES... Makes sense.

Lex Dillinger
Lex Dillinger

i lost interest at "who she be with" .... jokingly or not, LOURDES DUARTE... at least pretend you went to college.

Heather Rogerson
Heather Rogerson

How about suggesting condoms rather than mentioning herpes and ovulation ! No Jorge not all are

Jorge Garcia Jr
Jorge Garcia Jr

Dating Miami materialistic women? Lol never! Miami women make me laugh! "Plasticas"

slowcode
slowcode

How is this any different from any dating advise for anywhere else in the world? Looks as if you just copied and pasted it.


Danny Diaz
Danny Diaz

#1 Date someone who isn't from Miami, someone outside the U.S. you'll thank me later for this!

Carlos Mucha
Carlos Mucha

This list is very very basic. All this is supose to be very know.

Logic Prophit
Logic Prophit

how low have we sunk as a society that acting like a decent human being needs to be listed?

MyKohl MK Naight
MyKohl MK Naight

Dating advice in Miami is like financial advice you receive from a homeless drunk.

Tiffany Vinas
Tiffany Vinas

Lame do we really not know this it's common sense

Chandler Jackson
Chandler Jackson

In addition to #8 make sure ur clear on whether or not she's going to be there for a while. If this is indeed the case, suggest she informs an entourage of her acquaintances as you will do the same and you all can gather for activities planned together at the bar at approximately 2 a.m.

plopes0420
plopes0420

Worse yet, it's written by a woman! Well, I don't mean a REAL woman because SHE would never ask a man to text her after a date.

plopes0420
plopes0420

This is a horrible article. Horrible. Your articles didn't used to be this bad a few years back. Not only it's poorly written but the content is the WORST. "Text her after the date"? What are you 16 years old? How about CALL a woman? PATHETIC in so many ways.

Hey New Times I'll write for you if you stop putting out word vomit.

Vanessa Black
Vanessa Black

Lol! Seriously though, men in Miami desperately need this article... Blown up and put on posters all over the city.

LearnToWrite
LearnToWrite

One of the worst written articles ever to be placed on the internet.  I didn't think it was possible, but every single sentence contained at least one cliche.  Congratulations, you write like a 12 year old.

MAFIOSO
MAFIOSO

LOL LIKE TOTALLY RIGHT? OH MUH GAWWW

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