The Best and Worst Super Bowl 2014 Commercials
The game is over, the tears have been shed, and the Seattle Seahawks are going to spend the next six months bathing in Jacuzzis spilling over with champagne and thong-clad white women.
But while many Americans focused on Peyton Manning's sorry interception face, some of us fast forwarded to the commercials, greedily-lapping up every wonderful drop of American commercialism.
It seems every year before the Super Bowl, Madison Avenue shares notes because a yearly commercial theme becomes a little too obvious. Probably because the combined creativity of all those ad agencies isn't even close to what a 4-year old and a pack of crayons is capable of.
This years theme was obvious: celebrity appearances. Whether it was Stephen Colbert, Sean Astin, or Terry Crews, the people that fill the backgrounds of movies and TV shows got paid, and got paid big time.
But you want to know one thing: who was a hit, and who missed? We've got your back. Here are the worst and best of the Super Bowl XLVIII commercials.
Commercials That Sucked
6. Toyota - Highlander Commercial feat. Muppets and Terry Crews
Oh my god, Terry Crews ended up without his shirt on? Thank you Toyota. On the other hand, any reason to get the Muppets back on television is well worth it. Especially if it features Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem, and not Miss Piggy emasculating Kermit the Frog.
5. T-Mobile - What Can Tim Tebow Do With #nocontract
Tim Tebow has as much personality as a glass of water. From everything we know about Tebow, namely that he's a hardcore Christian guy, we know that he'd never have the balls to grow such an amazing mustache. The devil lives in mustaches that amazing, just ask Tom Selleck. At least he's figured out what to do since he'll never play football again. Next stop: male prostitute.