Global Warming Makes Couples Cheat, Says Dating Website

Categories: Sex/Fetish

sweat_beach_credit_helga_weber_flickr.jpg
Helga Weber/Flickr
If you're married in Miami, you might want to get out of town this summer. No, not to avoid the hurricanes -- to avoid a nasty divorce.

A new report blames global warming for rising rates of infidelity, especially bad news for couples in Miami, where rising tides and raging hurricanes remind us all how much extracurricular sex we could be having on a daily basis.

See also: Rolling Stone Predicts Miami Will Be Underwater By 2030

Victoria Milan, a dating website for people looking to cheat on their significant other, surveyed 5,000 of its members, both men and women. A shocking 72 percent of them responded that yes, their own Al Gore-esque stress about unpredictable weather is the cause of their extramarital dalliances. Guess the fact of their existing committed relationships was just an inconvenient truth.

Survey respondents also reported they're more likely to sneak a little on the side in hot weather than in cold. That makes sense -- after all, which would you say is sexier, a steamy Miami day or a polar vortex?

"Summer loving is something everyone experiences when they're growing up, and the excitement and thrill of doing something a bit naughty never fades," Victoria Milan's CEO and founder, Sigurd Vedal, explains in a statement. "It's no surprise that one half of a couple feels the itch when the weather warms up."

So let's recap: Hot, unpredictable weather makes for unfaithful partners. Just when you thought your hope of finding true love in Miami had hit rock bottom, a story like this comes along to prove there's even farther to fall. But hey, we'll all be underwater in 15 years anyway, right?

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164 comments
rjbsmit
rjbsmit

If Your Spouse Is Cheating On You That Means Your Marriage Is In The Dumps, And Who Knows Your Spouse Could Been Cheating On You Before You  All  Got Together So Once A Cheater Always A Cheater CHEATINGSPOUSES.INFO


sakers52200
sakers52200

Is it infidelity when a bunch of paid-for scientists screw the entire country?

ksmythe74
ksmythe74

Wow.  I think a lack of Co2 has made these people looney.  People make a choice to cheat and it has nothing to do with climate change.  It has to do with pleasing self and no one else. 

JoshuaHchrist
JoshuaHchrist

THIS is how you know climate religion is a HOAX. AL Gore is aka....are you ready.......BRUCE WILLIS in a fat suit and face latex. Hollywood has taken over the media and part of the government. And cousin Brucie is not the only A-list actor doing this sort of thing......Wellaware1 (dot) com

OJClutchpopper
OJClutchpopper

If these folks are so concerned about the whole CO2 thing, why don't they stop breathing?  That would go a long ways towards solving the (nonexistent) problem...

OJClutchpopper
OJClutchpopper

Wow.  Can People get any more stupid?  I mean, really?  WTF?  I can't even come up with a comment for this......

SukieTawdry
SukieTawdry

72 percent of cheaters blame their infidelity on stress about unpredictable weather. That's a new one. It's also a crock.

theblumorpho
theblumorpho

Which means that 72% of these FOKKING LOSER MORONS are self identified STUPID AZZ LIBERALS.  #WHODATHUNKIT?

Beachhawk
Beachhawk

Global warming!  That is really silly; Obama, Reid and Pelosi say that George W. Bush is to blame for infidelity

profshadow
profshadow

Wow,


What can't "man made Global WTF" cause?

Anything that has to be stretched that much indicates, at least to me, something seriously wrong with the whole premise.  


But then, I am an actual scientist, doing Real Science, unmotivated by either grants or politics.  


You know, Dihydrogen monoxide erodes mountains, causes animals to drown when it gets into their lungs,  It is extremely corrosive and a component in many dangerous compounds.  It is damaging to many metals.  And seems to be influential in many severe weather phenomena.


Petitions have been signed by hundreds, if not thousands, of people, calling for the banning of this chemical substance, given how dangerous it can be.


 For more info on DHMO, head over to: http://www.dhmo.org/facts.html 


floyd howard
floyd howard

Alert!!! Alert!!! Alert!!

From Democrat Headquarters: All democrats and supporters here and abroad, we must flood the media with hysterical climate change & global warming alarms to take the heat off Dem candidates in the November 2014 and 2016 elections due to the train wreck of Obamacare! Shout, scream, cry, make outlandish claims and don't stop till after the elections!!!

Alert!!! Alert!!! Alert!!!

dunnyveg
dunnyveg

I will take liberals seriously on global warming when they set the example for we Americans by adopting a combustion-free, pre-stone age lifestyle.  If we Americans don't die laughing, we might consider following suit.  Until then, we will live the way the liberals do.

dbohnenk73
dbohnenk73

Every dollar on this planet could not change one Florida summer thunderstorm! 

mako34
mako34

This is ridiculous.  Global warming doesn't cause infidelity.  It's Bush's fault!!

Lonemusketeer
Lonemusketeer

Don't believe anything anymore unless you can prove it yourself or by God's Word.

busseja
busseja

It's all about funding. When the money dries up things cool off.

busseja
busseja

It is all about funding.  When the money dries up things cool down.

SirGareth
SirGareth

Girls it has been proven by science that promiscuity helps reduce climate change.  Spread your legs for science  

RickyBobby
RickyBobby

America has become the land of the brainless and submissive feudal serf where all bow at the alter of feel good policies and government proclamations regardless of their intrusiveness, invalidity, or affronts to the constitution. The country is doomed.

firstprinciples2012
firstprinciples2012

Global warming (aka climate change) is the religion of the stupid. 


www.zazzle.com/FirstPrinciples?rf=238518351914519699

EdwardE
EdwardE

ASIA FOR THE ASIANS, AFRICA FOR THE AFRICANS, WHITE COUNTRIES FOR EVERYONE!
If “anti-racists” are so unconcerned with race, how come they only have a problem with White Countries, White Cities, White Neighborhoods, White Workplaces, White schools?
I’ve never seen any “anti-racist” complain that any place is too brown and it has to become LESS brown to combat racism.
Who do they think they are kidding?
“Multiculturalism” = White GeNOcide
Anti-Racist is a code for anti-White.

robertg222
robertg222

But the globe isn't warming. Unless you live the virtual world of poorly written computer software.

bob.finger59
bob.finger59

Next thing you know, they'll be blaming global warming for an increased occurrence of rectal-cranial inversion.  Or is it the rectal-cranial inversion that is causing so much bantering about global warming?

jcjjcj41
jcjjcj41

goverment condos all around

i mean bags

pschwing
pschwing

I was wondering what the upside might be to global warming!

HOT DAM!

jcjjcj41
jcjjcj41

WHEN UR HOT UR HOT.

NO DENYING A GOOD MORAL CLIMATE

fantum.2010
fantum.2010

So... We are back to Global Warming? What happened to Climate Change? Or does that only apply during an exceptionally cold Winter?

"Climate Change" is the term used after fake scientists are caught lying about "Global Warming!" Most folks call it "weather!"

fantum.2010
fantum.2010

Craaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap! Just when you think the lefty LOONatics can't possibly get any stupider!

travelyn
travelyn

"...especially bad news for couples in Miami, where rising tides and raging hurricanes..."


I can't remember the last time they had a major hurricane in Miami.  Seriously, lady, if you want to be a journalist, stop listening to what Obama says about the climate and do a little research.

pateichroew
pateichroew

What else can we blame this non-existent phenomenon on?

Oh, that way there's NO accountability!?!

Must be why O'Stupid embraces it so much!?!

(no pun intended)

mjanz60
mjanz60

We have to look at the brighter side here, the idiot's aren't blaming the TEA party, the NRA or Bush, blaming global warming is kind of a step in the right direction!

jvjj1244
jvjj1244

Al-Buffoon proved that -- he went through his divorce, he obviously felt no need to mention it is his boring speeches because actions speak louder than words.

jvjj1244
jvjj1244

Al-Buffoon proved that without ever mentioning it.

OJClutchpopper
OJClutchpopper

@profshadow Dude, I LOVE the whole DHMO bit.  Funniest damned thing I have ever seen in my life!  And the people that fell for it; OMG!!!  And how about Penn & Teller's bit on that?  Ha HA!!!  


I feel so ashamed for my country right now......

frasconr
frasconr

@firstprinciples2012 Sweetheart you "simpel-folk" are so cute.  AGW is not a religion where you can believe or not believe.  You study the data and the data is overwhelming and conclusive.  The science is settled./  Any questions???

frasconr
frasconr

@fantum.2010 Sweetheart you "simple-folk" just can't understand science can you????   The koch brothers must be very proud of you. You're as dumdb as they come.  Thank you

frasconr
frasconr

@fantum.2010 Sweetheart I love BITCH-SLAPPING the snot out of the "simpel-folk" are you busy??????

FinbarOS
FinbarOS

@fantum.2010 What person in their right mind ever thought lefty LOONatics couldn't get any more stupid?

frasconr
frasconr

@travelyn Sweetheart the research has been done the science is settled.  It's just sad that you "simpel-folk"can't understand it.  BATTA-BING!!

sakers52200
sakers52200

Settled by whom? By a collection of scientists of which most are not even trained in climatology? Or by those being paid for these results? Call me in 10, 000 years when we have a little history.

theblumorpho
theblumorpho

@frasconr @firstprinciples2012

THE EAST ANGLIA EMAIL SCANDAL says that YOU ARE A LIAR, AN IDIOT, OR A "BELIEVER" to believe in this global warming BULLCHIT after your key scientists were caught, LYING, HIDING THE DECLINE OF TEMP, BLACKMAILING PEER REVIEW JOURNALS TO NOT REVIEW THE WORK OF THEIR ENEMIES, AND SCHEMING TO AVOID ANSWERING FREEDOM OF INFORMATION REQUESTS. 


Either it's a religious belief for you, for which you can be excused and ignored, OR you are FULL OF SH*T.

SirGareth
SirGareth

@frasconr @firstprinciples2012 Actually 98% of scientists are now saying the globe is cooling and the data proves it.   You are reading yesterdays science, not today's science.   Science is always right but it changes very quickly, you must read faster.


Science is now changing faster than the climate. 

frasconr
frasconr

@sakers52200 Sweetheart, the science has been settled by the climate scientists who publish "peer-reviewed"  studies.  It's sad you "simpel-folk" can't understand science but that's what the koch brothers want. BATTA-BING!!!  Did you watch my show?  

crimea-river
crimea-river

@frasconr HAHAHA CLASSIC YOU! Nobody does the Colbert thing like you do. Not even Colbert himself! So when are you going to pull back the curtain and let everybody know you're kidding? The suspense is killing me.

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