​Don't know which hand to hold the whip in? Get sex, love, relationship advice from Mistress Lera by emailing askadomme@miaminewtimes.com. Read more about Mistress Lera at Notes From a Miami Dominatrix.

Dear Mistress Lera,

I heard the terms "lifestyle domme" and "professional domme" one too many times, especially on the fem- domme websites. My question is what the hell is the difference? You kinky folk are so confusing with your terms. Please explain the difference to a simpleton like me.

Sincerely,

Please Enlighten MeMore »

Don't know which hand to hold the whip in? Get sex, love, relationship advice from Mistress Lera by emailing askadomme@miaminewtimes.com. Read more about Mistress Lera at Notes From a Miami Dominatrix.

Dear Mistress Lera,

I fell in love with a woman, who I later learned was a dominatrix. She never told me herself and even denied it when asked. I found out from mutual friends. I am new to BDSM and my my experience with that scene is minimal. Is there a difference between the type of play in a relationship and the type of play that my pro-domme girlfriend does professionally? I'm worried what she'll think of me in the sack.

J.T

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​Don't know which hand to hold the whip in? Get sex, love, relationship advice from Mistress Lera by emailing askadomme@miaminewtimes.com. Read more about Mistress Lera at Notes From a Miami Dominatrix.

Dear Mistress Lera,More »

Don't know which hand to hold the whip in? Get sex, love, relationship advice from Mistress Lera by emailing askadomme@miaminewtimes.com. Read more about Mistress Lera at Notes From a Miami Dominatrix.

Dear Mistress Lera,

I really enjoy feeling pain and I often fantasize about being dominated by women. But I don't have the first clue about BDSM or where to start. I'm 18 years old, and I don't know anyone else that's into it.

I'm totally against self-harming, but I can't get enough if it's someone else doing it. I've tried talking to my girlfriend about it, but she thinks I'm a weirdo. She thinks the kind of person who would hurt me like that would never love me. Is it true that people into S&M are doomed never to love or be loved? We've been together a while now and I really love her and don't want to lose her, but I just feel like there's something missing in our relationship.

Yours,

Clueless Teen

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Don't know which hand to hold the whip in? Get sex, love, relationship advice from Mistress Lera by emailing askadomme@miaminewtimes.com. Read more about Mistress Lera at Notes From a Miami Dominatrix.

Dear Mistress Lera,

I've been in a loving relationship for over three years now. I've always had a thing for my balls being slapped around. My girlfriend loves it as well. I just wanted to know, even though I do enjoy it, and it isn't extremely hard (although she can really have at 'em), is there a risk of permanent damage? I've heard that this practice is something that can render you sterile, and we definitely don't want that. Since we heard that, we pretty much refrained from anything of the sort. I just wanted to hear what someone with more experience might think.

--Ball BusterMore »

Don't know which hand to hold the whip in? Get sex, love, relationship advice from Mistress Lera by emailing askadomme@miaminewtimes.com. Read more about Mistress Lera at Notes From a Miami Dominatrix.

Dear Mistress Lera,

This South Beach gal is in dire need of your advice. Although, I haven't done anything over the top sex-wise, I know that I am a naughty, naughty girl. I want to experience the worlds of BDSM and avant-garde sex to the fullest, but the problem is that I am single, and unfortunately, I've got no playmate to experiment with. How can I be safe and have fun with these experiences and where the hell do I go to find them?

Sincerely,
Miss Kinky Boots
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Don't know which hand to hold the whip in? Get sex, love, relationship advice from Mistress Lera by emailing askadomme@miaminewtimes.com. Read more about Mistress Lera at Notes From a Miami Dominatrix.

Dear Mistress Lera,

My boyfriend and I decided to take a break from our families and celebrate Christmas together this year. Since it gets really hectic on Christmas Eve, we just want to stay in at our place and watch some movies. We're super tired of watching the same conventional holiday flicks every year. Could you recommend something S&M-themed to spice things up?

Sincerely,
Grumpy Grinch
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​Don't know which hand to hold the whip in? Get sex, love, relationship advice from Mistress Lera by emailing askadomme@miaminewtimes.com. Read more about Mistress Lera at Notes From a Miami Dominatrix.

 Dear Mistress Lera,

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Don't know which hand to hold the whip in? Get sex, love, relationship advice from Mistress Lera by emailing askadomme@miaminewtimes.com. Read more about Mistress Lera at Notes From a Miami Dominatrix.

Dear Mistress,
I'm totally obsessed with retro pin-up Bettie Page and have been sporting her blunt bangs for years. But when prowling one of her fan websites, I've stumbled upon a picture of my beautiful Bettie all tied up, gagged and spanked. What a turn off. I don't get what people find so attractive about being tied up. Why are some many people into bondage? What's wrong with them?

Sincerely,
Not Into BondageMore »

Don't know which hand to hold the whip in? Get sex, love, relationship advice from Mistress Lera by emailing askadomme@miaminewtimes.com. Read more about Mistress Lera at Notes From a Miami Dominatrix.

Dear Mistress Lera,
I'm engaged to a very successful corporate lawyer. He went to Harvard Law, has been banking six figures ever since he was 24, and is well on his way to becoming partner in the firm. Every morning, he puts on his cufflinks, grabs his lambskin briefcase, and I'm so proud of him. But recently, he confessed that before he met me, he had regular appointments with a professional dominatrix. Why would a man who has his shit so together pay someone to whip him? I don't want to marry a sexual deviant.

Sincerely,
Cold Feet

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