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Simon Hare and Amber Hawk Swanson

Earlier this week, Amber Hawk Swanson spent her final day on South Beach with her sex doll.The dark-haired 27 year old lounged for one last photo shoot with Amber Doll, the 115 pound-plus silicone figure that was molded from her face.

The sisterly pair sported matching white glam shades. The doll wore a bikini with the word, love, printed on one breast. Amber dressed in a flirty, red sundress. “We’re done, a total wrap,” the Chicago multimedia artist said after the final photos were snapped on a gorgeous sunny day with a postcard-ready blue sky.

Past moments captured when artist and doll went roller-skating, married each other, and sat in on tailgate parties are featured in, “To Have, To Hold, and To Violate: Amber and Doll,” an exhibition at Locust Projects in Wynwood. It opened this Saturday and will show through June 28.

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Syesha charmed us early in the process, belting out Aretha Franklin with her busted vocal cords at the end of the Hollywood tryouts. Mercado is the second FIU student to make it onto Idol, but she outlasted fellow alumna Nadia Turner by five rounds. But until a recent turnaround, her continued presence on stage among the finalists seemed almost a fluke.

She was frequently in the bottom three, yet held on while seemingly stronger contestants went home. Thankfully a strong performance of a Sam Cooke tune last week reinvigorated both the singer and her fan base. But it wasn't enough. While none of the top three was especially good this past Tuesday night, Syesha's decision to sing Peggy Lee's "Fever" was fatal. You knew it as soon as you saw the prop chair at center stage. When it was finished, Simon Cowell told Mercado she'd probably regret that choice 24 hours later, and Simon Cowell is just about always right. (Except when he's praising David Cooke, but I'll get to that.)

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Robert Rauschenberg’s death Monday night at his home on Captiva Island has prompted the Miami Art Museum to install one of the shape-shifting artist’s acrylic on copper paintings at the entrance of its plaza level galleries in his memory.

Executed in 1986, Untitled measures a little more than six-by-three feet. The last time it was seen at MAM was during the museum’s Big Juicy Paintings show in 2006. MAM's last Rauschenberg exhibition, Scenarios in 2005, did not include the work, which was donated to MAM by Rauschenberg’s friend and fellow artist James Rosenquist.

“Rauschenberg was noted for his infectious enthusiasm and for his willingness to take risks and push boundaries,” MAM Director Terence Riley said in a statement. “His eagerness to explore ‘the gap between art and life’ in an astonishing variety of forms and media made him among the most influential artists of our time.” A museum spokesman says the painting will be up until early June. --Frank Houston

Tomorrow night at the Raleigh Hotel, Chanel will present its "Cruise 2008" fashion collection. Designer Karl Lagerfield says the collection is inspired by Miami:

"The concept of the Cruise Collection is based on traveling, and Miami is the ideal destination: A city that moves and has energy, with its small districts and its animated streets."

Ah, yes, those "animated streets." So animated that we kill people on occasion. So animated that for the third year in a row, Miami was just named the worst American city for road rage. Anyway, here's a video from the Chanel collection that will get your mind off today's hellish commute. -- Tamara Lush

I am unabashed in my adoration of GBS. Ever since I got a curl cut by Fort Lauderdale hair wizard Larramy, and was introduced to the phenomenal Deva Curl hair system at the local beauty supply store/salon hybrid, I just can’t stop singing their praises. Sure, there’s a time and a place for good ol’ Sally’s, and there are certain products you can only get at Ricky’s NYC. But I love GBS because it reps the 305. IT’s the only place you can get your manicured paws on unique local brands like Hot Pants Cosmetics, or Play Pretty Beauty. (Stay tuned for reviews of both of those South Florida based product lines). And unlike the two aforementioned beauty store rivals, GBS shows love with Customer Appreciation Day. Which – joyous rapture – is today!

From 9 a.m. to 7 p.m., shoppers can stop by the Pinecrest branch (11297 S. Dixie Highway, Pinecrest) for complimentary treatments galore. There’ll be mini-facials by Babor, makeup tips by glominerals, skin analysis by Murad, Phyto hair treatments, Zoya manicures, and flat iron demos by FHI. Experts from Wella, colorOn and Nuxe will be handing out samples like crazy, all while you nosh on deli deliciousness from JoAnna's Marketplace and Misha’s Cupcakes. Oh, and there’s a 20 percent discount on every item in the store. Shop now, thank me later.

If you’re feeling frisky after your shop-a-thon, swing by The Hotel’s pool deck (801 Collins Ave., Miami Beach) for SELF Magazine’s Mid-Week Makeover Event. From 8 to 10 p.m., sip cocktails, and live the luxe life with mini-manicures and massages. Wednesdays haven’t been this sweet in a long time. RSVP at 212-286-6202.

- Patrice Yursik

Jose D. Duran

I promise this is the final Wynwood mural in the series I've been doing lately. Who could blame me though? The entire area surrounding NW 2nd Avenue and NW 23 Street is covered in murals. This is one I actually saw getting painted a few months ago during Art Basel. It reminds me of the things childhood nightmares are made of.

I regret not stopping at the time and asking the artist for their name. A lot of people like to guess it's FriendsWithYou, but I'm fairly certain it's not for numerous reasons but primarily because they would never do anything so twisted and morbid.

- Jose D. Duran

Hello, Kitty

A few nights ago I was hanging out with my girl and this new guy she’s dating when my amiga went to the kitchen to refill our drinks, and he started flirting with me. He was telling me how sexy my arms are, what a pretty smile I had and all, until my friend came back in and he went back to acting like I wasn’t there. I figured that I must have been imagining things, but the entire night I kept feeling as if he was staring at me. The night rolled on and my bff said that she was tired and wanted to leave (we were all at my house) – so her guy popped up and said he would take her, but asked me if he could come back since we were both still wide awake and there was plenty more beer. I agreed with him and said he was welcome back – but I didn’t really think he would come. Sure enough, 30 minutes later he was pounding on my door. This time he threw himself at me, making it very clear what he wanted – and it wasn’t another beer. One thing led to another and we ended up having sex. He told me he would beat my ass if I told my friend what happened and I don’t want that but I do think she has a right to know - I’m a gay man, and I feel like she should know that she’s dating one too. Should I tell her that we had sex? Help!

Mr. Metoo

Hi, Mr. Metoo

Yes, yes, yes – since you two are like the Hialeah Will and Grace, you’d better tell her that her man is playing both sides. It would be great if I could say that she’ll still be your friend afterward, but she may not be. Confessing sins is great for the soul, but it can wreck relationships. So yeah Metoo, let her know what you did but be prepared to lose a friend about halfway between "So he came back over...," "He was kissing me on my back," and "I screamed like Minnie Ripperton." Telling the truth won't be as fun as doing the do, but what did you think would happen after your girl's date had you (or you had him) bent over your coffee table? If you and your friends have worked out a system where you test out their dudes' gay-fliction and then your reward is to “have” them, cool. But if not, stop fucking their boys. Stop flirting and allowing them to come back over to your house for more beer, Mr. Metoo. Maybe something inside of you makes you want to have what the girls have, and taking these studs to your pasture is a thrill, but do that to your semi-girls.

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Miami-Dade’s top public corruption prosecutor doesn’t have to worry about the Florida Bar coming after him anymore. Bar counsel Arne Vanstrum has dismissed a complaint against Joseph Centorino, the assistant state attorney who heads the public corruption unit, alleging he acted unethically by not prosecuting high-ranking officials in the Miami-Dade County Public Schools system.

Specifically, former schools consultant Laurance Costanzo accused Centorino of obstructing justice by protecting Miami-Dade Public Schools Superintendent Rudolph "Rudy" Crew, Schools Police Chief Gerald Darling, and district bureaucrat Rhonda Vangates for their alleged role in covering up the Northwestern Senior High School sex scandal that rocked the school district last year.

After initially notifying Costanzo this past December 17 that his complaint “has been determined to be a matter which warrants further investigation,” Vanstrum informed him this past March 20 that there was insufficient evidence indicating Centorino violated any bar rules. Vanstrum reached his conclusion after receiving a five page letter from Centorino's boss Chief Assistant State Attorney Don Horn who argued that Costanzo's allegations were "outreageous, unworthy of belief."

Centorino declined comment, but in an earlier interview said that Costanzo’s complaint “has no merit.” Meanwhile, Costanzo says Vanstrum is also part of the conspiracy to cover up public corruption. "I am not the least bit surprised," he says. "Birds of a feather flock together."

-- Francisco Alvarado

The city of Miami's Bicycle Action Committee is currently working on two maps, one that would be a kind of “user map” and the other a “future bike routes” map.

The first of the two, a map showing current bike facilities in the city, isn’t a bad idea, per se – but it does strike the Bike Blog as being a little like a treasure map showing where the booty isn’t.

But the second map, identifying high-priority bike routes within the city of Miami, is a potentially useful tool.

We’d like to throw out a few ideas:

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Folks who know stuff – and one’s gotta presume the folks at a Bill Maher show know stuff – know that stuff is, er, fucked up. A lot of stuff. Among such stuff: oil’s through the roof, housing’s in the gutter, and we’re at war where we shouldn’t even be.

So it stands to damn good reason that a man like Bill Maher would be popular among a certain subset of know-somethings; what seems unreasonable is why all these know-somethings need Bill Maher to tell ‘em what they already know, let alone validate their opinions.

But such seemed to be the case Friday night at The Fillmore Gleason, where America’s favorite leftie curmudgeon preached to a choir that had already concluded their song.

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Here I thought popped collars went the way of the dinosaur. The only people who should ever see a popped collar are sororities girls as they are getting date raped at that bitchin' kegger. Then again, that's probably how this guy's kid got conceived. I guess the popped collar gene is dominant.

Jose D. Duran

Walking down Lincoln Road not too long ago, I overheard a snooty conversation about art. A man and a woman carrying shopping bags stood in front of a gallery with their heads titled to the side, like a couple of trendy philosophers.

“Installations,” the woman said through her nose. “These are the hottest thing in art right now.”

I’ll bet you my tiny New Times paycheck they weren’t from Miami. Take Saturday night’s Wynwood art walk for proof. The walk was a chance to see everything from mixed media crochet to abstract video shorts. But one thing - thank God - was missing: artsy pretentiousness.

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The humidity was killer this weekend but that still wasn't enough to keep people home with their air conditioners on full blast. Perhaps the threat of West Nile in the coming months will.

944 Miami One Year Anniversary Party

Ivon David Rojas

Not even Mickey Rourke's face could damper the mood at the 944 Miami One Year Anniversary event at the Plunge Rooftop Lounge & Bar at the Gansevoort Hotel.

Museum Quality at Bas Fisher & Hexagon at MAS

Justin Namon

Wynwood's Second Saturday art walk featured plenty of openings, with the highlights being Museum Quality at Bas Fisher Invitational featuring the works of Alvaro Ilizarbe, the man behind Freegums, and Hexagon at Miami Art Space with FriendsWithYou, Bhakti Baxter, Kiki Valdes, 1st Ave Machine and more.

- Jose D. Duran

Apparently, the Miami-Dade County Corrections system isn't the only lockup that has problems keeping its inmates healthy and alive. The Washington Post is running a four-day series on the hidden world of immigration detention facilities -- and how detainees awaiting deportation receive shoddy medical care.

The paper found that 83 people have died in recent years in these federal facilities. One well publicized case happened right here in Miami: the uncle of Haitian-American writer Edwidge Danticat died in Nov. 2004 at Krome after not receiving medical care. The elderly man, named Joseph Dantica, had arrived in Miami on a flight from Haiti, with a valid visa, and he was still denied help. The Post highlights Dantica's case and several others. Many stories involve immigrants who lived in Florida and found themselves sick, or dead, behind bars. There's also a few Cubans who died in detention facilities around the country, as well.

The series is a must-read. The reporters amassed thousands of pages of federal documents and inmate letters, and have placed many on the paper's website. -- Tamara Lush