Lynch's Inland Empire is Long, Disturbing

Categories: Culture

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David Lynch joined the Miami screening via webcast

"We are like the spider; we weave our life and then move along in it. We are like the dreamer who dreams and then lives in the dream," said David Lynch during his live introduction via webcast at The Colony Theater (1040 Lincoln Rd., Miami Beach) last night. He looked from side to side and then continued, "this is true for the entire universe. We hope you enjoy your experience tonight. Ladies and gentlemen, INLAND EMPIRE."

If Steven Spielberg smoked crack, E.T. may have turned out like Lynch’s unbearably long – three hours – digital-video opus about an aspiring actress, slowly falling into the dark void of Hollywood.

In a scene near the end of the film, Laura Dern’s character, Nikki Grace, runs down the street screaming after being stabbed in the stomach with a screwdriver. She collapses next to a crack head and a homeless couple who seem to be completely unfazed that Dern is bleeding to death.


Midway through this one-time only Miami screening, the extreme close-up of Laura Dern’s face started melting. The film suddenly stopped and the lights in the theater turned on. While the people in the projection booth popped the second reel in, a majority of the audience used this intermission as a chance to escape. After about five minutes, the lights dimmed, the film reappeared, and the remaining audience members applauded.

The after-party at Fanuccis (1233 Lincoln Rd., Miami Beach) was all about discussing David Lynch while enjoying the complimentary vodka. “That movie felt like getting pecked to death by chickens,” one woman said about Inland Empire. “Maybe I’m just an ignorant American, but I like movies that make sense,” said her boyfriend. “I never want to see another David Lynch movie again.” -- Jason Handelsman

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