Chávez cut the lights? Conspiracies Abound.

So now that Fidel is bedridden or beyond, conspiracy theorists may have new targets on which to blame all things shitty in Miami. In explanation for today’s blackout affecting as many as four million South Floridians, a Caracol 1260 AM announcer retorted, “Hugo Chávez cut the lights.” He laughed, though slightly nervously.

One caller couldn’t believe it was somehow “normal.”

On the Miami Herald’s comments section, where crazies often reign, various explanations emerged. Some included that Florida Power & Light was trying to make a strong case for nuclear energy. “FPL is probably about to seek permits for a new nuclear plant and wanted to scare people to avoid public protests.”

“I’m terrified” wrote: “We have 'A massive failure,'' cutting power to 3 Million people in South Florida and FPL is in the dark as to the cause!"

Anxious hours later, the power company explained that the outage was sparked by a fire at a FPL substation. Have to say that the idea of Chávez somehow flipping our switch and, of course, snickering as Miami turned black, is much more entertaining.

--Janine Zeitlin