Last Night: Chris Rock at the Hard Rock

Categories: Culture
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I have to say I thought Chris Rock was getting soft when he directed and starred in last year’s “I Think I Love My Wife.” I’m just not used to seeing Pookie playing corny roles. Thankfully, Rock was back to his old raunchy self during his sold out performance last night at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino. In fact, he tore the house down with a blistering stand-up act that took no prisoners. Whether it was poking fun at America’s fears of electing a white woman or a black man president or skewering the hypocrisy of the mainstream media’s outrage over the major league baseball steroid scandal, Rock demonstrated why he is arguably the most socially conscious stand up comedian in the game.

On Hillary Clinton: “Hillary Clinton is good for one thing only – forgiveness. She is so good at it that Jesus said to her: I talk the talk but you walk the walk.”

On Barack Obama: “He’s a black man with two black names. You expect to see him holding a spear, standing over a dead lion … But Barack doesn’t act like the black candidate. He actually thinks he can win this thing fair and square.”

On George W. Bush: “No one has given less of a fuck than Bush. If you was hanging from a cliff and all you needed was a fuck to save your life and George was at the top of the cliff with eleven fucks in his pocket and you asked him to give you one he would say ‘I don’t give a fuck.’”

On the Major League Baseball and Olympic Games steroid scandals: “The U.S. government is not trying to get Bin Laden. The U.S. government is going after Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens …Marion Jones is in prison. Don’t you feel safe?”

On Barry Bonds: “Who here wouldn’t take a pill to make more money at their job? Shit, I make good money, but I’d take a pill to make Will Smith money.”

On Babe Ruth: “He ain’t shit … He never played against blacks or Latinos. It ain’t a sport without blacks. It’s just a game. Fuck Babe Ruth.”

On America’s founding fathers: “Fuck George Washington. Fuck Jefferson. Fuck all them mother fuckers on your money. They were all slave owners. Money ain’t nothing but racist trading cards.” -- Francisco Alvarado

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