Top 5 Violent Games

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Violence and videogames have been together since the beginning of time (or at least since videogames evolved beyond Pong). As we move into an era where the unlikely “uncanny valley,” the idea that as video game characters become more like humans yet not completely so they actually cause revulsion in those playing the games, isn’t so farfetched, I chose to take a look back and pick five game series which took violence to unprecedented levels and then told gamers, “You better like this or we’ll kick you in the throat.” So here they are in all their gory goodness: -- Elvis Ramirez

5. Postal

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Postal is one of those games with absolutely no shame. At least Mortal Kombat had a story, a thin one but one nonetheless. Postal pretty much drops a machinegun into the player’s hands and says go kill things. Uwe Boll is making a film based on the game, now that’s an act of violence against the American public.

4. Grand Theft Auto

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Be honest, how many hours did you spend running over pedestrians in the game before you actually went and completed your first mission. GTA is one of those series where the missions and story progression are good but the real icing on the cake is when you can take a break from running drugs for the big boss, and punch a random passerby and then gun him down when he retaliates.

3. Assassin’s Creed

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You can assassinate people in the middle of the city for no other purpose than your sick, twisted enjoyment. Need I say more?

2. Condemned

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Any game where you can bludgeon someone to death and actually cringe as you hear the bone cracks and see the other player go down is pretty damn violent. If you don’t think so, then maybe you should put the controller down and go paint or something to let out your frustrations.

1. Super Mario Bros.

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I think I can hear a resounding “WTF” as readers reach the end of my little list. But think about it, Mario runs around and jumps on a Goombas head until it’s skull shatters, he then proceeds to jettison a Koopa out of its shell and then kills it with its own shell, and finishes off Bowzer by knocking him into a pit of lava. That’s like a scene out of Rambo or Missing in Action. Plus, Mario is a commie, and we all know they are ruthless.

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