Pretty in the City - The Nose Knows at Medhur

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Within minutes of meeting Maria -- my waxer-to-be at the Medhur Day Spa -- she had me lying on my back with two wooden sticks pointing out of my nostrils. The ends of those sticks had been dipped in hot wax, which she then pushed into my virgin nose-holes with the entreaty: “Relax and breath through your mouth. We’re bringing sexy back.” Relax? WTF? How could I, with hot wax plugging my vital air passages? My mouth-breathing was ragged, desperate, and Lamaze-like while the wax cooled and hardened. Then Maria went one-two-YOINK, and my nostrils were almost hair free. A second round of wax-dipped sticks took care of the rest. Just when you think you’ve waxed every available orifice already, here comes something more interesting.

When I signed up for the “Women’s Package #1” at Medhur – which includes eyebrow shaping, under arms, upper lip, and nose – I assumed nose waxing meant the exterior, which I’d done before and was totally cool with. According to Maria, interior nose waxing makes you look younger, makes you look prettier and cleaner, and is just fine for almost anyone, unless you’ve got allergies. Almost all the hair removal at Medhur is done with a pink bubblegum colored no-strip wax (for what Maria refers to as “the peach fuzz”), green wax is reserved for thicker hair, like you-know-where. And Maria was very proud of her sick bikini waxing skillz. She was actually disappointed that I wasn’t visiting for a more intimate package. “You gotta come back for the bikini,” she insisted. “It’ll improve your sex life by 75 percent!” I LOLed and asked her where the statistic came from – “From me! From my clients,” she said with a sassy grin. I liked Maria instantly. She is mad cool, very reassuring, and through her no-nonsense banter, she made the procedure almost entirely painless.

Prices at Medhur are slightly more than some of the local wax chains, but as Maria explained, you pay a few bucks more for the places that don’t recycle their wax. Package #1 cost me $34, and a “naked bikini” costs $37 for ladies, $45 for men. Oh yeah, they do that there. Although Maria tells me, “for men, the chest hurts more than the bikini. I know. I can see it in their eyes.” Having watched Steve Carell scream and bleed in The 40-Year-Old Virgin, I totally believe her.

So how goes breathing through a hairless nose? Good – every breath feels extra deep and almost refreshing. But I am extremely aware of the slightest traces of moisture, and my latest paranoia is that I’ll laugh and like, blow a bubble I didn’t mean to or something. Would I do it again? Probably not. But I’ll definitely return to Medhur. They also do amazing manicures and pedicures, and sell a wicked selection of Havianas. Call 305-758-5750, or visit www.medhur.com. Oh, and bring cash – their credit card machine doesn’t work, and otherwise your trip will end with a visit to the barbershop/meat market next door to hit up their ATM.

- Patrice Yursik

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10 comments
Beauty Equipment
Beauty Equipment

 I like your post. Update these types of topics regularly.

ugh
ugh

ladies, ladies... let us get over ourselves.

leeeeysen, i am a frequent flyer at the good ol medhur spa, and maria is my personal angel when it come to removing a certain protein filament from all the places i wish it didn't grow. i spread it ALL and within moments its slip and slide get loose up in my caboose. ive gone to an endless number of heavy handed wax masochist who've had me wanting to get the fuck outta there mid "RRIIIPP", but when i found maria, it was love at first pull. she stuck those sticks in my nose too and surprisingly, it didn't hurt at all...you make it sound like some crazy Chinese torture method- its more like a cleansing feeling. no different than when your senile grandfather used to grab your nose and say "i got yer nose!" and you were like," yo, what the fuck?". ok, maybe thats just me but c'mon... bunch a sissys in here. not that it is at all necessary, but it had me wanting more (or i guess, technically- less) so, in the words of those lame, forwarded text messages we all fucking got this week, lets all wax our coochies in celebration of no more Bush!

P.S. to all you hippies out there who like to "let the garden grow" more power to ya, but i must fuckin say... it is god damn AMAZIN when that shit is smooooooth sailin. so your loss. when you get over that shit, give my girl angel hands a call... she'll rock your world.

xoxo

Anya
Anya

Yikes. I'm a perfumer and I would be so afraid that my nose might be damaged. The olfactory receptor bulbs are at the top of the nasal passage - one stray drop could fry them. Still, interesting, but I like my air filtered, so I'll keep the fur in there ;-) BTW, the link to the spa doesn't work. The phone number looks like my neighborhood, and I might be interested in other, non-nasal work.

Anya

Elyse
Elyse

Waxing your nostrils or not, Medhur is great and Maria's always fun. She actually convinced me to wax my bikini area. And although I felt violated and cheated out of a dinner and movie, it did improve my sex life. But only 70%.

Patrice
Patrice

Uh, yeah. Wikipedia says I wasn't smart for doing that -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/N...

"given the function of nasal hairs, many physicians recommend trimming them lightly, if at all." So bear that in mind, readers!

Patrice
Patrice

LOL Gail -- thanks! Got your comment. I made such a whimsical and quick decision to wax the nose hairs, I seriously questioned myself on the ride home. But no repercussions thus far. I wouldn't recommend it for anyone with a low pain threshold though. And I probably won't do it again. Letting the garden grow =)

gail
gail

warning, warning, brain malfunction site....won't...post...end....of....sentence

gail
gail

Diffusion of ultra fine particles to the nasal hair occurs mostly for particles < 5 nm. Nasal hair has important implications for the health of the human body because a lack of nasal hair could invite the transport of potentially harmful particles into the respiratory system.

gail
gail

Diffusion of ultra fine particles to the nasal hair occurs mostly for particles < 5 nm. Nasal hair has important implications for the health of the human body because a lack of nasal hair could invite the transport of potentially harmful particles into the respiratory system.

gail
gail

Oh for fuck's sake, now I've heard everything. here's a little health news flash maybe maria is keeping under wraps:

Nasal hair, or Nose hair is the hair in the nose. Adult humans have hairs in the anterior nasal passage. These hairs act as a fibrous filter for inhaled particles. Diffusion of ultra fine particles to the nasal hair occurs mostly for particles < 5 nm. Nasal hair has important implications for the health of the human body because a lack of nasal hair could invite the transport of potentially harmful particles into the respiratory system.

My advice? Girl, let your garden GROW!

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