Any One Got $22 Million Lying Around?

Categories: Unreal Estate
The view from Apogee's pent house, soon to be the sight of flag burnings.
The penthouse of Apogee South Beach just went on the market for a whopping $22 Million. No joke. $22 Mill. Or, as pinko, Paris-based scum rag The International Tribune points out, only 14.9 million Euros.

Yeah, rub it in our face Frenchies. Our economy is in the dumper, and all of Wall Street combined couldn't pull together $22 for an hour at Eighth Street's cheapest hooker motel, let alone $22 million for a SoBe pent house. [Insert more faux right wing, Anti-Europe disgust, even though after eight years of Neo-Conservatism we have a horrible, horrible economy while the Communist European Union, with their shared God-hating currency, are managing to hold out the storm comparatively well even if they continue to take collateral damage from our failings.]

As the IHT points out in a blog post, actually authored by a man based in Texas, it will "provide an interesting benchmark for the state of the Miami market ... Despite reports that prices have fallen 20 percent or more in many Florida markets, agents say the high end of the Miami market has remained strong, in large part due to foreign buyers. A $22 million price tag should test that theory."

So, if this property sells it'll most likely go to some elitist European or Middle Easterner who will quite literally look down at all of South Beach and let shreds of our worthless American dollars rain over us while drinking the tears of so many innocent American patriots.

--Kyle Munzenrieder

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