Get Ready For Even More Hurricanes

Hurricane Gustav

Gustav, Hanna, Ike and Josephine are the biggest names in the news right now who don't have pregnant teenage daughters, but get ready for Kyle, Laura, Marco, and even the bone-chillingly named Nana too. Hurricane forecasters are predicting that September could be an unusually busy month for storms, with possibly twice as many of the named suckers as last year. The crystal ball they look into shows five more named storms, four of them hurricanes, and two of 'em major. So stock up on the plywood, bottled water, and anti-anxiety pills now, because chances are we're going to need them, especially the latter.

--Kyle Munzenrieder