Big Tuna Ready to Flee the Fins? For Detroit?!

So is Bill Parcells a masochist, or what?

This is the guy who voluntarily went to work for borderline-psychotic Dallas owner Jerry Jones, who left a cushy retirement to take over the staggeringly awful 1-15 Dolphins. For all Riptide knows, he's got a side gig involving a rubber ball mouth-gag, a basement trunk and Quentin Tarantino.

That's the only conclusion we can reach after hearing the latest NFL whispers. Fresh off orchestrating one of the sweetest turnarounds in league history, sticking it to the Jets and bringing the playoffs back to Dolphin Stadium, the Big Tuna reportedly might be on his way out of South Florida.

And headed for -- WTF?! -- the Detroit Lions. Ball gag tight enough, Bill?
According to ESPN, everything hinges on whether Fins owner H. Wayne Huizenga completes the sale of his ownership stake to co-owner Stephen Ross. When Parcells joined the Dolphins earlier this year as executive vice president, his contract included an opt-out clause if ol' H. Wayne sold the team.

The sale won't go through until January, and Parcells has some playoffs to worry about first. But USA Today reports that, indeed, the Tunafish is looking at Detroit because the first 0-16 team in league history "interests Parcells as a reclamation project."

Bring out the gimp!

-- Tim Elfrink