Got Laid Off? At Least You're Not a Ballerina

Miami City Ballet announced it won't renew contracts for eight of its ballerinas and all apprentice dancers next season. Getting laid off sucks, but what exactly do you do when you get cut from such a specialized position as ballerina?

If you get cut, for example, as a journalist, you at least have some options. Write that novel you've always wanted to. Take a crash course in "snark" and get onboard with a blog or some other new-media startup. Become a special assistant to the county manager. Send in your resumé to a (shudder) PR firm. But poor ballerinas; they've been training for their jobs since they practically popped out of the womb, and graceful leaping isn't exactly a skill needed in many other fields.

There's no such thing as new media for ballerinas. If you're dancing online, well, your viewers probably aren't interested in your technique. Any other dance opportunities? Broadway is slowly dying. There hasn't been a big movie musical since Chicago. All music videos require their dancers have ample ass.

So if you get that pink slip soon, remember -- at least you have more options than a ballerina.