Last Night: Shelley Novak Awards
Shelley Novak, South Beach's fabulous semi-retired queen of drag, started the show with a duet. Her partner in crime: the self-deprecating, blond-wigged Joanna Mills. While presenting "most glamorous" underneath a giant disco ball, Joanna -- clad in a tighter-than-imaginable tan spandex dress -- cracked, "You have no idea what it took to get in this dress. Not just emotionally but physically. The recoil on this thing could send me to Hialeah!"
Photographers laughed and snapped shots with long-lensed, expensive cameras. A short, ponytailed straight girl commented, "It's really sad -- they look better in a dress that I do." Tables full of well-groomed gay boys clapped and sipped cocktails.
Shelley handed out signature gold spray-painted Barbies as trophies for winners in categories including Best Newcomer, Most Glamorous, Best Promoter, and Best DJ. (Sasha Philips, new to the scene, took home at least two of the awards while we were there.)
Who needs the Oscars? Boys in dresses are way more fun.