Obama to Manny Diaz: Don't Ef This Up

Categories: News
As his young administration stomps frantically on the flaming bag of crap formerly known as the global economy left smoldering on the White House doorstep by a snickering Dubya on his way out, President Obama is about to throw around a cool $787 billion in stimulus funds to try to douse the flames.

Courtesy Wikimedia Commons
Lookin' at you, Manny.
Understandably, he's feeling some pressure to make sure all of that sweet, sweet taxpayer sugar turns into the 3.5 million jobs he's promised. Today, he turned that pressure right onto one of America's slimiest, least reliable groups of human beings, who soon will have a lot more cash to play with: U.S. mayors. Specifically, Obama turned up the heat on our own Manny Diaz, mayor of a town that is not exactly celebrated for wisely using public funds.

"The American people are watching," Obama said ominously to Diaz and a cadre of other mayors in Washington, pounding a baseball bat into his hand as he spoke. (OK, maybe that happened only metaphorically.) "If a federal agency proposes a project that will waste that money, I will not hesitate to call them out on it and put a stop to it. I want everyone here to be on notice that if a local government does the same, I will call them out on it."

Diaz, who is the head of the U.S. Conference of Mayors, tried to laugh off the warning, according to the Washington Post. "Absolutely. We get called out every day on the local level. We have plenty of constituents who will do that before the president does."

Hear that, Miamians? Mayor Diaz, President Obama, and basically the entire free world are counting on you to give him hell when he wastes your taxpayer dollars on baseball stadiums, underwater tunnels, and robot police officers that will someday surely turn evil.

With the Herald reporting this morning that Miami-Dade mayors are already scouring the stimulus bills for cash like a bunch of schoolkids with their hands in the Halloween bucket, rest assured -- there's going to be plenty to complain about.

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