The Five Worst Super Bowl Ads
5.Doritos: Crystal Ball
Well, look. We've found the worst comic actor of all time.
4. CareerBuilder.com: Tips
My job doesn't make me cry constantly or day dream of punching small animals, but this commercial sure does.
3. Sobe: Lizard Lake
Sports stars, unlike movie stars or musicians, don't often face the "Sell Out!" accusations and are free to cash in on a ridiculous number of endorsement deals. But, c'mon, Ray Lewis, Justin Tuck and Matt Light, you have to draw the line somewhere, and doing ballet in bedazzled Lycra is well past that line. Then again, considering Dan Marion hawks Nutrisystem, and Jason Taylor shook it for Dancing with the Stars, this isn't really that bad. Hope you got a nice paycheck though, whores.
Special 2.5: The Danica Patrick GoDaddy.com Commercials (here and here). Danica, like the football goons in #3, you're a total product whore. But at least their commercial looks half way professional, unlike you and the guys (who are legitimately poor, so they're excused) in #2.
2. Cash4Gold.com: Here's Mooooney
If you're going to spend the $2.5 million for a Super Bowl spot you might want to spend more than $2.5 hundred on the production value.
1. Cars.com: David Abernathy
Rushmore sold me on Wes Anderson and Bill Murray's reinvention as an indie darling. This shameless ripoff ad unfortunately doesn't sell me on Cars.Com. Unoriginality, what else would you expect from a company owned by a consortium of newspaper chains?