The Talented Senator Damon? Not If We Draft Judge Judy
|via Wikimedia Commons|
Weaver thinks the "career politicians" like Kendrick Meek and Dan Gelber spew the same "imperial foreign policy platitude" as Republicans, and another outside voice is needed.
"Matt Damon has the potential to add that voice to the debate, and actually be electable. He's smarter (Harvard) than Ronald Reagan and Arnold Schwarnegger (and to my knowledge does not have a naked picture published in a body building magazine with his body all oiled up) [ed note: close enough?] and has been involved in numerous humanitarian civic causes. He knows public policy. If potty mouth Al Franken (another pro-war Democrat unfortunately) can win in Minnesota .... I rest my case."
"Potential" being the key phrase. Weaver isn't actually sure if has that voice, but he's more than willing to supply it to him ("Matt, if you believe in a new foreign policy, call me. I will brief you and point you to resources. And most importantly I will guide you to people who will help you frame and advocate a new foreign policy in a way that is electable.")
This is truly inspiring! In fact we're so inspired we've decided to draft a Celebrity to set up as our own personal puppet candidate as well: Judge Judy. She's a part-time resident over there in Naples. We're not 100% sure on her political affiliation, but she's a Jewish, female lawyer from New York, appointed to the bench by a Democratic mayor, believes in a woman's right to choose, opposes teaching creationism in public schools, and likes stem cells. We'll fill in the rest of the views for her latter. We're also pretty sure she doesn't have any Bourne movies left on her contract. Judy, email us.