Mel Martinez Has Been Searching His Soul Tonight, And He Is So Done With Public Service

For a man who has held so many government positions, Mel Martinez never seemed too gung-ho about public service. As he put it in his book, A Sense of Belonging, politics, "sort of sneaked up and tapped me softly on the shoulder." But after all these years he would like that gentle tapping to leave him alone. In 2006 he was selected to head the RNC, but then was like, "you know what guys, this isn't for me, sorry." Then he was expected to at least run for reelection to Senate. Instead he was like "Peace out, DC." Then rumors swirled that he may become president of FIU, and he was like "Fat chance." Most recently there was discussion in Tallahassee that he could be the next Chancellor of the state's university system, to which he is basically saying, "Seriously, guys I am done with this public service. Stop asking me. I mean really, did you think I was that good at it to begin with?" He's been down this road, walking the line that's painted by pride. And he knows he's made mistakes in his life that he just can't hide.

See, Martinez has been searching his soul tonight. He knows there's so much more to life. Now he knows he can shine a light to find his way back home ...to Orlando and private law practice! 
Maybe, he'll open a hip law office with his best friend from law school, and hire a revolving cavalcade of sexy young lawyers who share an awkward unisex bathroom, and retire at the end of the night to hear live music from Vonda Shepard. Perhaps Martinez will mentor one young lawyer, a single, thin woman with a penchant for short skirts and a vivid imagination, not only in her professional career but on her personal life as well, and ...these are the plot and theme lyrics to Ally McBeal, aren't it?

Anyway, he wants to be a private practice lawyer now. He is done with public service, ok. He's been doing this stuff for too long and his book didn't even sell that well, so can you blame him if he just want to cash in? No one really liked him all that much anyway.