Soon Dolphins and Marlins Games Will Remind You Of Horrible Music and Corona Ripoffs
Take a seat, PetCo Park. Nice knowing you U.S. Cellular Field. Farewell, Citi (Taxpayer Bailout) Field.
via Wikimedia Commons F*#% YOU, BUFFETT
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to: Land Shark Stadium.
WHY? WHY MUST YOU DESTROY ALL THAT IS GOOD AND HOLY IN SOUTH FLORIDA, JIMMY BUFFETT?
Sorry. Deep breaths. It's just that those of us here at Riptide like going to Marlins games without thinking about "Margaritaville" and the god-awful Corona-ripoff brew that will apparently soon be our baseball corporate overlords.
The Marlins haven't made this deal official yet, but we just got an invite to an "exclusive live music performance and media announcement for a major unveiling on behalf of Dolphin Stadium" featuring Jimmy Buffett on May 8th.
So we're going to take that as proof that this is a done deal. And also that God does not exist.