In a Democratic Wet Dream, We'd Belong to the State of the Everglades

Categories: Politicks
It's not exactly uncommon to hear someone floating around the political fantasy of South Florida becoming its own state. Not to say it'd ever actually happen, but c'mon, we all know the rest of Florida is holding us back. 

Well, a new political map that redraws the United States with the idea of making both the electoral college and Senate more democratic (in the nonparty sense) and in line with the "one person, one vote" ideal breaks South Florida off into its own state. 

In addition to the traditional SoFla clump of Miami-Dade, Broward, Palm Beach, and Monroe counties, Collier, Highlands, Glades, and Hendry counties would join us in the new, great state of the Everglades. The rest of Florida would belong to the states of Ocala and Okefenokee. 

Besides the democratic pluses of the plan, there'd be local benefits too. All of our state sales tax money (assuming we'd keep that setup) would be used closer to home. With swamp land and miles of beaches, the Everglades would be an environmentalist's dream state. Florida's gay adoption ban probably wouldn't carry over, and we'd be able to set up some form of civil unions.

But there are drawbacks. Could you imagine the corruption? Judging by our local governments, it could very well be rampant. Even Collier County officials have a history of sleaze (golf stadium, anyone?). The economy would be almost totally limited to development and tourism. We'd lose our discounted ticket to Disney World, and our students would have only two in-state public colleges to choose from: FIU and FAU (though I guess we could rename them Everglades State and University of the Everglades).

Worry not, though -- it's just a crazy blog map that, for better or worse, will never come to fruition.

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