The Nuts and Bolts of the Indianapolis Colts

Categories: Sports
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Dolphins fans owe two debts of gratitude to the Indianapolis Colts this year: (1) for dropping a regular-season game to ensure that the '72 Fins remain the only team in modern NFL history to complete a perfect season, and (2) for stopping the NY Jets, with classless coach Rex Ryan, from playing in a Super Bowl in our home stadium. 

That doesn't mean the franchises are exactly friendly. From 1970 to 2002, the Fins and the Colts were division rivals, a conflict agitated from the beginning by the fact that the Dolphins lured Don Shula away from the Colts, then in Baltimore, in '70. The Colts charged the Fins with tampering and received our first-round draft pick as a settlement. It was little consolation considering Shula went on to a legendary coaching career in Miami. 

Let's let bygones be bygones, though, and play the role of good hosts to the Colts (despite the fact that the team is staying in Fort Lauderdale). So, like yesterday's New Orleans Saints rundown, here's a locals' guide to the Colts. 

Culture Shock: We weren't sure if such a thing as "Indianapolis nightlife" exists, so we searched high and low for party pictures from the city, and this is what we found. Compare and contrast with this latest (NSFW) batch of photos from LIV and come to your own conclusion. Pictures speak louder than words, but let's just say it'll be a big one.

Famous Fans: Billy Bob Thorton is a Colts fans  (interestingly, Angelina Jolie's current man, Brad Pitt, seems to be in the Saints camp). David Letterman is an Indiana boy and has had Peyton Manning on his couch. Subway pitchman Jared Fogle used to be a huge Colts fan; now he's a smaller Colts fan (badda-bing!). William Shatner and John Mellencamp are also apparently fans. 
 
Player Most Likely to Be Found in the VIP Room: Does Peyton Manning actually know how to have a good time? Or is his idea of a good time engaging in Oreo "lick races" with Donald Trump? We'll go with Reggie Wayne, though we wouldn't be surprised if Hank Baskett's wife, Girls Next Door star Kendra Wilkinson, drags him out somewhere.

How Dolphins Fans Can Elicit a Rex Ryan-Style Flip-Off: Just say, "Welcome to Miami, home of the only team with the balls to go for a perfect season." 

Players With Miami Connections: Wide reciever Reggie Wayne (University of Miami '00), defensive tackle Eric Foster (born in Homestead, graduate of Homestead High), and kickoff returner Chad Simpson (born in Miami, graduate of Miami Edison High).

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