Miami Named Second Least Manly City in America by Mutant Snack Food Brand

Categories: Survey Says
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Our first instinct upon learning that Miami was named 49th out of the country's 50 biggest metropolitan areas in a ranking of "manliness" by Combos, those horrible snacks filled with vaguely cheese like filling, was to be defensive. How dare they challenge our machismo?

Then we read what actually went into making the list, and we're actually pretty glad Miami didn't measure up in one of the most sexist, backwards marketing schemes we've ever encountered. Yeah, fuck those little artery cloggers and their gender stereotypes.

The "study" took into account sports, manly lifestyle, manly retail stores, salty snack sales and a newly added category this year called "manly occupation." In a grease covered backhand to all female cops, firefighters, construction workers and EMT personal, Combos has deemed those jobs only suitable for men. The percentage of those jobs are taken into account in the rankings.

Other categories also feed into the gender binary. "Manly lifestyle" is determined by the "the number of pickup trucks and motorcycles registered in the city, sports TV viewing habits, fishing and home improvement."

If you're still uncomfortable with Miami's manliness being challenged, remember that AskMen ranked us the 7th best city in the world for men to live.

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