The Heavy Toll of Shaving-Cream-Pie Celebrations Has Caught Up With the Marlins

​All the recent Marlins walk-off wins and ensuing shaving-cream-pie-to-the-face celebrations has claimed its first victim. It was only a matter of time. An MRI has determined that outfielder Chris Coghlan suffered a left knee injury after he planted a shaving-cream pie into the face of Wes Helms after the Marlins' walk-off win Sunday against the Braves.

The reigning rookie of the year tore the meniscus in his left knee when he hit Helms with a shaving-cream pie and landed on the knee wrong. No reason was given for why a dude has to have a running jump in order to face-plant a shaving-cream-pie into another dude's face, but there you have it.

Coghlan will be out two to three weeks, maybe more if surgery is required.

And you can forget about anymore shaving-cream-pie celebrations. Manager Edwin Rodriguez has banned them indefinitely, probably making Donnie Murphy very sad.

Naturally, we have to blame the bullpen. Not only are they costing Josh Johnson a Cy Young, and not only are they to blame for most of the Marlins' losses this year. But also their late-inning ineptness has now caused the Fish to have to rely on walk-off wins, which in turn led to shaving-cream-pie-to-the-face celebrations, which has now led to Chris Coghlan landing on the DL. Nice going, jerks!