Notre Dame Coach Thinks Lack of Nude Beaches in Texas Gives Him Advantage Against Miami

​The Miami Hurricanes and Notre Dame Fighting Irish will meet for the first time in two decades in this year's Sun Bowl in a renewal of one of college football's most intense historic rivalries.

Of course, a lot of things have changed in those two decades, and both teams finished with a painfully mediocre 7-5 record. The 'Canes are in a frantic search for a new coach, and Notre Dame's first year under Brian Kelly is a reminder to 'Canes fans that even if the U does score a superstar coach it's no guarantee things will be turned around in a single year. However, Kelly thinks he has one big advantage going into the game: there's no nude beaches in El Paso, Texas.

Kelly has coached six teams to bowl births this will only be the fourth time he's actually coached in a bowl game. The biggest bowl of his career was the 2008 Orange Bowl with the Cincinnati Bearcats right here in Miami. That's when the team's hotel accommodations turned into a comedy of errors.

"I think I've hit all the problems that you can have," Kelly told the South Bend Tribune.

"Miami -- there's distractions until 3 o'clock in the morning, especially when one of the floors in your hotel is a nude beach.

"So there are distractions that I've obviously been able to balance coming into El Paso, Texas, that I think are pretty valuable to me. So I think I have a pretty good plan at this point."

A nude beach, really? The Bearcats originally stayed at the fancy Fontainebleau for the New Year's Day bowl game, but had to change accommodations the night before when they realized that Diddy was having his New Year's Eve bacchanal at the famed hotel.

So, nude beach at the Fontainebleau, huh? I guess by Catholic standards Miami Beach is just one giant nude beach.

Anyway, is there a nudist Hurricanes fan club? Please exist, and please do your duty by buying up all the extra hotel rooms at what ever El Paso joint Kelly puts his team up in.