"Fake Cocaine" is Now Banned in Florida

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​Kids snort the darnedest things. Apparently, they've been sniffing a substance sold at specialty and head shops marketed as bath salts that mimics the effects of cocaine and LSD. Yesterday, newly elected Florida Attorney General Pam Bondi issued an emergency rule banning the substance while the legislature works to make the ban permanent by possibly adding it to a law that would also ban fake marijuana.

The bath salts are sold in half gram bottles, but are commonly understood to be used as a snorted stimulant. Bath & Body Works costumers need not worry, however, since regular old bath salts are still available.

"It makes you think you're seeing monsters and it also makes you think that you can fly and there are a lot of balconies out there," Bondi told the press.

One woman under the influence of the substance tried to chop her mom's head off after mistaking her for a monster, while another man apparently gained superhero strength and required seven police officers to subdue him.

The substance has been linked to two suicides in Louisiana, as well as numerous hospital visits and calls to poison control in Florida.

Bondi wanted to get the ban in place before Spring Break, and her rule will be in effect for 90 days. After that, it's up to the Florida Legislature to officially ban it. Plans to add it to a bill that would ban so-called synthetic marijuana are already in the works.

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