Marco Rubio Wouldn't Let Victoria Jackson Play Her Ukulele, So She Almost Quit Political Activism

Categories: Politicks
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We cannot fathom a world where former SNL star and proud Miami native Victoria Jackson didn't go on her weird rants about her strange political beliefs. I mean, we don't agree with anything she squeaks, but we will fight to the death for her right to squeak it (and, of course, our right to laugh at it). In her latest column for WorldNetDaily, Jackson remembers the time she almost quit her political activism, and it was all because she wasn't asked to play her ukulele song about President Obama being a communist at a Marco Rubio rally.

The column is a very strange love letter to journalistically troublesome, former Matt Drudge crony Andrew Breitbart. See, Jackson thinks Breitbart is a really important and supersmart guy, and the whole column is actually kind of sad once you realize she draws her entire self-worth from being validated by her various connections to important right-wing figures.

I guess, for whatever reason, the Rubio campaign didn't feel like validating Jackson:
I moved to Miami and took my mom to a Marco Rubio rally right before his Senate election. It was mostly in Spanish. I hadn't been asked to sing my "Commie" uke song (that I'd sung at rallies across the nation), and this was my hometown! Discouraged with political activism and ready to quit, I showed my mom Psalm 26, which the day before had encouraged me to stay the course. Right before I started to read it aloud, my cell rang and it was Breitbart. He knows my number?! My mom looked at me impatiently. I mouthed, "He's big."

Andrew began, "You're vindicated!" I said, "What?!" I thought fast. Did I do something wrong? Break a law? Kill someone? Andrew continued, "You're vindicated, Victoria! There's a new book out called 'Radical in Chief' by Stanley Kurtz. It's not a talk-show book. It's a real book. It details all of Obama's radical communistic past! You're vindicated!" As he continued talking excitedly about his new Pigford Scandal unraveling, I thought about what a kind person this was, to remember our conversation a year ago. When we hung up, I tried to explain to my mom who this famous person was. Then I picked up the Bible to read her the verse I had started 20 minutes before, Psalm 26:1, "Vindicate me, Oh Lord. ..." My mouth dropped open! Vindicate?!
Is this what all of your ongoing political weirdness is about, Victoria? Making friends and feeling important? We will be your friend. We'll let you play ukulele for us (nonpolitical songs only, though). We will try to validate you and call you on your cell phone in front of your mother to tell you how awesome you are. Just keep giving us this cheap blog fodder, and we'll give you whatever you want.

[via Wonkette]

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4 comments
RawFishShoes
RawFishShoes

I keep thinking jackson is going to appear on letterman and say (a la joaquin phoenix) it was all a big joke, that all of her ramblings have been an ongoing SNL, performance art piece. Still hilarious after all these years.

zhenglishu
zhenglishu

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Iuzzolth
Iuzzolth

Much agreed Drake and please continue to spread the word about our beloved douche-lord of a Senator. Although I question who is the more ignorant, Rubio himself or the morons who voted him into office...

Drake Mallard
Drake Mallard

he same Marco Rubio? That Talks Big but Fails to Deliver?

Before the March 2000 session, Rubio was hardly the scorching conservative who would later woo Tea Partiers nationwide. He said he'd focus on supporting early education and community policing. And he wasn't particularly passionate about cutting spending. In his first three years, he supported adding a $4 surcharge to cruise tickets to fund a Marlins stadium and a $1.2 million earmark to build new bike paths in his district

spent thousands with GOP credit card

Records show Rubio sent payments to American Express totaling $13,900 for his personal expenses during his tenure as House speaker. But those payments were not made monthly. He made no contributions to the bill during a six-month stretch in 2007, records show.

Charges covered by the party as political expenses include:

• $765 at Apple’s online store for “computer supplies.”

• $25.76 from Everglades Lumber for “supplies.”

• $53.49 at Winn-Dixie in Miami for “food.”

• $68.33 at Happy Wine in Miami for “beverages” and “meal.”

• $78.10 for two purchases at Farm Stores in suburban Miami.

• $412 at All Fusion Electronics, a music equipment store in Miami, for “supplies.”

One committee paid relatives nearly $14,000 for what was incorrectly described to the IRS as "courier fees" and listed a nonexistent address for one of them. Another committee paid $5,700 to his wife, who was listed as the treasurer, much of it for "gas and meals."

Rubio's spending continued in 2005 when the Republican Party of Florida handed him a credit card to use at his own discretion. While serving as House speaker in 2007 and 2008, he charged thousands of dollars in restaurant tabs to the state party at the same time taxpayers were subsidizing his meals in Tallahassee.

Rubio's wife, former Miami Dolphins cheerleader Jeanette Dousdebes, served as the committee's treasurer. In reports filed with the state, Rubio and his wife failed to disclose more than $34,000 in expenses over an 18-month period.

Marco Rubio was facing foreclosure on a Tallahassee house after missing five months of mortgage payments, according to a lawsuit filed in Leon County Circuit Court.

Will the Birthers Scrutinize Marco Rubio's U.S. Citizenship?

if the Republican care about the Hispanic they will remove wet foot, dry foot" policy, in terms of allowing Cuban refugees that racist

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