Pepe Billete's Top Five Reasons The Miami Heat Will Win The NBA Title

Categories: Sports
Pepe Billete.jpg
Oye, Guanabacoa's most famous resident since Rick Sanchez is guaranteeing the Miami Heat will pick up its second Larry O'Brian O'Brien trophy in the NBA Finals.

In his latest YouTube video, Pepe Billete explains why the Dallas Mavericks suck ass while partaking in one of his favorite past times. We've loosely translated his five reasons:

5. The Three Kings: Guade (Dwayne Wade), LeBronsito, and el Bosh.

4. El Trensu, AKA Udonis Haslem, who apparently is a Cuban who came on the same boat that brought over Pepe during El Mariel.

3. The Mavericks are named after Tom Cruise, who is a weirdo.

2. Dallas point guard Jason Kidd is too old (so old his nuts drag on the floor), shooting guard JJ Barrea is too short and a Puerto Rican who is easily distracted by rum and hos, and forward Dirk Nowitzki's grandparents are most likely World War II war criminals.

1. To spite the Heat haters, especially Charles Barkley, who is as fat as an onion.



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14 comments
Adnis
Adnis

Jakes on you!!

DC
DC

Whoops...

Bobby Davidowitz
Bobby Davidowitz

Genius, my friend, genius....I went to Florida and died when you did the Haslem bit...I unlike "Hater AG" though it was hilarious .... dale papa!

PepeBillete
PepeBillete

Coño, thank you New Times. Los quiero con cojones, Pipo. 

Baya, seguro que el "AG" nacio en Chicago. 

AG
AG

Love the fact that a "journalist" misspells the "Lary O'brien" trophy. LOL NICE!! Also, the "Nowitzki's grandparents are most likely World War II war criminals" joke....full of class. Cheers to "Pepe" for another classy video.

AG
AG

Read Le Batard's commentary on the term "hater" and how "dismissive" and "lazy" it is (They won't let me post the link on this message board). Differing opinions are now label "hating" because your linguistic skills are lacking.

AG
AG

Read Le Batard's commentary on the term "hater" and how "dismissive" and "lazy" it is. Differing opinions are now label "hating" because your linguistic skills are lacking. http://www.miamiherald.com/201... 

AG
AG

Nah, en Coral Way y la ochenta y pico....Keep it classy buddy.

Donald Xu
Donald Xu

Of course, I mean the video and not the first comment written by the stick-in-the-mud, for those with a sense of humor. Just in case.

AG
AG

Of course, for those that don't speak the subtle language of sarcasm, I'm being sarcastic. Just in case.

Derric Flores
Derric Flores

AG, looking at your post history, its pretty evident that the term "hater", in its purest sense, fits you perfectly. You certainly are not what Le Batard was talking about. Everything you've written on here is shitting on someone else's opinion or work. You're that guy. In Spanish its called un AMARGADO! Seriously, No one gives a damn about your opinion. You're vying for attention by going "a la contraria". It seems like you have some things to work on regarding your personality, pal. Get a life or better yet, a girlfriend. 

Bobby Davidowitz
Bobby Davidowitz

Linguistic skills are lacking?...well excuse me sir...I was unaware that video commentary was judged so stringently in terms of linguistic prowess. Yet I find it intriguing that while you berate my diction you make no rebuttal of the accusation that you are IN FACT...a hater...a herb....a mark...y pa los Hispanos...une pendejo. LOL!!! Furthermore, there really is no synonym that better describes you than hater. That said, I appreciate your opinion...and I got nothin but love for ya AG...shit, was that too lazy? Stay classy.

305 chico
305 chico

OOOOOOOhhhhh in yo FACE AG!!!!

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