Where In The World Is Hugo Chavez? Watching Porn Perhaps

​Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez is still officially recovering from surgery. Although, we think his people would have come up with a better excuse than he needed to have an abscess removed from his pelvic region. Cuz that only makes us wonder where he's been dipping his stick if you catch our drift.

But many of his constituents aren't buying the official United Socialist Party line. Neither are we.

So where oh where could our favorite International Man of Mystery be hiding out?

Our intelligence reports recently tracked him down near the Afghan border in Pakistan:

​We hear he's kept busy watching old speeches of himself and downloading porn from Reality Kings website 8th Street Latinas.

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