Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that series.
Charged with: Loitering or prowling, tampering with physical evidence, resisting an officer with violence to his person, battery on a law enforcement officer
Yeah, but you should see the other 27 guys he battled epically on the deck of an empty ocean liner in the dead of night. They kept coming at him one-on-one instead of just mobbing him, and nobody thought to bring a gun despite the fact that he badly injured (but didn't kill) 46 henchmen in the exact same hand-to-hand fashion (this time the fight was in an oil-slicked warehouse) the night before. It was weird.
Charged with: Aggravated battery
If this guy doesn't have a T-shirt reading, "Snoop Dadd," then his family doesn't love him.
Charged with: Battery, resisting an officer without violence to his person, probation violation
The Nintendo suits make him wear the hat when he's on the job. But when Mario gets home to his Brickell penthouse, he likes to condition his hair, put on some D'Angelo, call his favorite escort -- he and the Princess are on a break -- look in the mirror naked, and say, "Who's a plumber now, bitch?"